4:24 AM, Sunday June 4th 2023
Hi Gimmic,
Good job on completing the challenge! This challenge is a test of patience and perseverance and it's commendable that you go through the challenge until the end. However, your submission shows some problems I want to adress:
1. You did not follow the instruction properly
1.1. The instruction requires us to draw only 5-6 boxes per page but you went for 7 or even 10 boxes for some pages.
1.2. Your hatching lines didn't follow the ghosting method - https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/ghostedlines. Take boxes 24 & 26 for example, you did hatching very haphazardly and for boxes such as 142 & 144, hatching lines don't fill up the front plane as there's still gap between one end of a line and an edge of a plane. I suspect you didn't draw hatching lines from your shoulder and didn't take your time to plan for each stroke. Make sure to (1) apply the ghosting method for every single straight line you draw in this course to make it smooth & straight (although for hatching you don't have to plot two dots before connecting), (2) space them out evenly and (3) leave no gap in between a stroke and the edge of a plane. You can check out some example for hatching in this page to see how they follow point (1), (2) and (3): https://drawabox.com/lesson/250boxes.
1.3. We are asked to draw boxes in 3 points perspective where the edges converges towards three vanishing points. However, the majority of your boxes have 0 point perspective https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/8/0pp, which is considered non-existent. Take your box 198 for example, extending lines in 3 directions remain parallel and not converging. This is wrong as they must be converging, not parallel. The 5:08 to 7:04 minute mark of this video explains why the edges cannot be parallel. Even if you go for shallow foreshortening, the edges must be converging, not blatantly parallel. Some boxes that have the same mistake are: 206, 219, 221, 224, 250. Boxes 204 also have a similar mistake but it's diverging instead of parallel. This tutorial is a good starting point on how to avoid this mistake.
2. Mark-making
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Although your mark-making shows improvement, I still want to address some mistakes you make along the way. Box 161 has a lot of chicken-scratching on the topmost line and box 156 has very wobbly lines, especially at the bottom. You should review this page: https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/3 and make sure your stroke complies to the three rules in the page. The way to do so is applying the ghosting method properly. No need to worry if your lines don't come out as accurate and are off from their intended path. Think of it as a trade-off: (1) a line with smoothness but offshoot all over the place or (2) a line with accuracy but wobbly and shaky. The two types of line have both an upside and a downside, the question now is: which upside is much more favorable that we are willing to accept the downside? In this course, we choose upside (1).
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This mentality applies to line-weight as well. You add line-weight by following the similar technique in Superimposed Line exercise of lesson 1. The difference is you draw over a line once, not 8 times and you must do ghosting method to ensure a smooth & straight line comes out. Even if the line is not accurate, move on. Don't try to correct them. Take your box 170 for example, it seems like you draw over the top left edge 3 to 4 times. Remember one is enough.
3. Convergence
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Not much that I can critique here since the majority of boxes doesn't follow the instruction. However, I see some of your boxes have a mistake that is often referred as converging in pairs: (see this image for example: https://imgur.com/KSHwTwo). This is usually a divergence/parallel issue between the edge of the initial Y and the edge of the back corner. Take box 217 for example, extending lines towards the left have this mistake. The 3rd image of this link is from a box that I critique for other person but the point is still relevant here: https://imgur.com/a/s4qS8ls. Make sure to go through this link as well: https://imgur.com/a/bYtf93a.
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I recommend you try out my favorite way to plan out all corners for your boxes (see this image for more explanation: https://imgur.com/a/Xg1JDpy). Basically, I'm plotting the back corner before the 3rd corner. In the image, colored lines are ghosting lines and they do not appear on the paper. I only start connecting when I feel 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and back corner are all converge decently to the three vanishing points.
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This is a tricky task because you have to plot 4 corners in the position so that they can maintain this relationship: https://i.imgur.com/8PqQLE0.png in three directions. Therefore, it's important to take your time in this stage and plot as many dots as you need to find a suitable location for your dots (see this image where I throw a bunch of dots on the canvas).
Because you didn't follow the instruction properly, I cannot mark your submission as complete. Please rely this critique with one page of shallow foreshortening and one page of dramatic foreshortening and we will see from there. Read this link in regard to both shallow & dramatic foreshortening: https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/10/foreshortening. Go for 5-6 boxes each page. Do hatching & line-weight as I told above and finishing off with extending lines. If you have any questions regarding this critique, feel free to ask me. I'll answer them as best as I can.
Next Steps:
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1 page of shallow foreshortening boxes.
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1 page of dramatic foreshortening boxes.
Go for 5-6 boxes each page. Do hatching & line-weight as I told above and finishing off with extending lines.