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1:55 PM, Monday December 19th 2022

Hi,

Thank you for your critique, and I apologize for having taken so long before being able to submit my new homework.

I read your critique several times, and reread the lesson 4 critique and took notes of the main mistakes.

Here is my new submission

Although I’m training almost every day, it took me a lot of time to do these 4 drawings : I’ve spent several weeks on each animal, doing a lot of drafts to find the best way to use as minimal masses as I could, without oversimplifying the shapes. I’ve also drew around 50 heads of each one, trying to find the best way to do them. Unfortunately, I was stressed when knowing I was working on the submission version, and some of my drafts where probably better on some parts than these 4 pages.

i also had a cold for 2 weeks, during which I had to stop drawing for 1 complete week as my arm was shaking due to fever.

In the end I had 4 pages of animals, but realized, that my eye socket shapes were too rounded as I was trying too much to mimic the rounded shape of the head ball. I decided then to redo all of the 4 drawings with more pentagonal shapes for the eyesockets. That requested another complete week to redo all of the drawings.

Even though I worked on this homework almost everyday, that’s why I couldn’t submit earlier.

With all my apologies.

There are still mistakes, but I didn’t manage to do a complete version without some.

The kestrel’s left wing was hard for me as it was seen from an angle. I tried to build shapes to mimic the rounded joint at the top. I also had difficulties to do the flat shape of the head without reverting to 2D shapes.

Some of the drafts of the elephant head where better than this one, but I didn’t manage to redo them as well on this version, especially the eye : the eyeball was probably too big and as I tried to correct when drawing the eyelids, it feels it as a been little bit flattened. I’m disappointed as I did much better elephant eyes.

The cat’s tail was tricky as it was going back and forth as well as up and down at the same time, hence the different degrees of my ellipses. But I didn’t manage to vary them in the right progression. I also missed one of them when drawing the tail’s contour : my precision from the shoulder is not good enough for drawing such short and sharp curves.

For the bear, I tried to mimic your « helmet » from the tiger head example. I also missed the proportions of the nose which is too long.

I tried to draw extra line weight only where it is needed as you requested in your critique.

Thank you for your help and advices.

7:26 PM, Monday December 19th 2022

You don't need to apologize - there's no timeline required for submitting revisions. This is a course that people complete at their pace, and while it is of course the student's responsibility to ensure that they're doing what they can to follow the instructions they're given as closely as possible (ideally without redoing work, but given all the things that got in the way, I understand why you went about it that way - I just wouldn't recommend grinding like that in the future), there is no expectation in how long that will take.

Overall your work is coming along quite well, but I added a couple notes of things to keep an eye on here:

  • At the back of the neck there, you've got a mass running right along the edge of the ribcage - this is two 2D shapes interacting with one another, but it's not a 3D relationship that you're defining. To make it 3D, you actually have to wrap along the surface of the ribcage ball form (or as we'll discuss in the next point, along the surface of the torso sausage that engulfs it).

  • I noted that with the mass along the underbelly, you've got it wrapping similarly along the edge of the ribcage ball. Remember that the ribcage ball gets engulfed by the sausage, and does not protrude from it - so it kinda ceases to be relevant, and wouldn't be something you'd wrap along. Instead you'd be running along the torso sausage, like the masses I drew along the back of the neck.

  • Along the leg, I noted that you're focusing your masses to capture specific bumps on the silhouette, individually. What we want to push towards is achieving an interlocking structure, forcing us to consider how these different masses fit together.

  • Your head constructions are definitely coming along, though don't be afraid to draw those eyeballs bigger. Also, because we're working in 3D space, they do not have to fit right inside of the eye socket shapes - as you can see how I drew them, some of them are offset a bit, due to them sitting a little behind that surface level of the face.

So, keep at it, but as it stands you're heading in the right direction and doing so fairly well. I'll go ahead and mark this lesson as complete.

Next Steps:

Feel free to move onto the 250 cylinder challenge, which is a prerequisite for Lesson 6.

This critique marks this lesson as complete.
6:45 AM, Tuesday December 20th 2022

Thank you very much for your critique.

And thank you for your advices about the legs construction and of not running along the silhouette : I realize I hadn't understood these points yet which led me to draw 2D shapes.

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