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10:46 AM, Sunday April 14th 2024

Hi, I'm Laura and I'll be handling your lesson 1 critique today(s).

Lines

Superimposed Lines - Looks good, starts with a bit of wavering, but progresses to smoother lines and reduced fraying. When executing the marks, try to focus only on the end point, without questioning how your line is going, this can help reduce any mid-way corrections your brain urges.

Ghosted Lines & Ghosted Planes - Good confident lines for the most part, it looks like you have a slight curl when you start the lines, try to take more time to align your pen and touch it down on the point, then execute the line. There's also some arcing in some of the lines, which can be counteracted with more consciously using your shoulder to execute the strokes, and trying to intentionally arch the line in the opposite direction to cancel it out if it persists.

You understood the line exerices and did a good job, just need a bit more time putting your pen down, otherwise any wobble or arcing should improve with practice.

Ellipses

Table Ellipses - Good attempts, tried to fit them snuggly though most are a bit loose, you drew through them 4-5 times, which is not good, you should only draw through the ellipses 2-3 times, as more than that you begin to lose your ellipse and it turns into a bundle of wires that doesn't really showcase an ellipse anymore. There's also the issue of deformation and lack of smoothness really - using your shoulder is paramount to drawing smooth ellipses, so here are some tips you should try: Ghost through your ellipses, be confident in your stroke, and on the second rotation try to follow your first rotation as closely as you can. Additionally, make sure you're using your shoulder to draw them, minimizing movement from the wrist and elbow, that should get you smoother ellipses at the cost of some accuracy initially.

Rereading and watching the video of this(https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/16/remember) section of the exercise should explain it better.

Ellipses in planes - Same tips as the previous one.

Funnels - Same as the others, the ellipses are centered and in the correct angles, fit in the funnel, but not with each other, and don't look very smooth.

Try doing another 2 pages of table ellipses and 1 page of funnels with a focus on smoothness, after rereading this(https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/16/remember) part of the exercise and watching the accompanying video.

Boxes

Plotted perspective- Looks good, all done correctly.

Rough perspective - All good except for repeating lines, you should not repeat lines no matter how they turn out, Keep it as if it were executed correctly and move on.

Rotated boxes - You followed the core steps of the exercise, kept gaps tight and consistent, rotated the boxes as they got farther from the center, and drew through your boxes, good job. Though I noticed:

- As on the previous exercise, there were repeating lines.

Organic Perspective - Looks like you understood the exercise, used the ghosting method(though repeated lines again), and almost all lines of the boxes are converging, though the foreshortening is a often a bit too dramatic, it should be kept rather shallow, as that can help you better understand the subtleties of the angles you work with.

Overall, you understood the box assignments and executed them well.

Summary

Pretty good overall, you just need to remember to not repeat lines, and most of the rest should get refined with practice.

Though I will ask that you repeat 2 pages of table ellipses and 1 page of funnels, with a focus on smoothness and only drawing through them 2-3 times, reply with them once you're done.

Next Steps:

2 pages of table ellipses and 1 page of funnels, with a focus on smoothness and only drawing through the ellipses 2-3 times.

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
4:35 AM, Friday October 25th 2024

Hello, Laura

Thank you much for taking your time to critique my work. Also, sorry for the long break, I have been busy with life recently. So here are my new table ellipses and funnels!!

https://imgur.com/a/ZwKOo5F

and Thank you again for your time :)

9:39 AM, Monday March 17th 2025

Hey Kycin, same.

Looked at them, and the new ellipses look great, drawn through 2-3 times and look much smoother than before, funnels still have a bit of a gap issue(between the ellipses) but you'll get there through practice.

I'll mark it complete.

Next Steps:

Add all lesson 1 exercises to your warmup pool and move onto the 250 box challenge.

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete, and 2 others agree. The student has earned their completion badge for this lesson and should feel confident in moving onto the next lesson.
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