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2:03 PM, Tuesday February 18th 2020

Hi!

Arrows

Overall they are pretty confident and flow nicely. To improve them, you can try to exaggerate how they get bigger as they come towards the viewer, both the size of the arrows, and the space between the folds.

Organic forms

The organic forms with ellipses are mostly kept to the simple forms we should be aiming for on this exercise, though some of them are a bit different, here you can see how they should be. 2 balls connected by a tube of consistent width. Another problem is that, as you can see in that picture too, you aren't drawing the spines (the axis) of the sausages, which makes it harder to allign the ellipses to it, so don't forget to do it in next exercises. Lines are a bit wobbly too, remember that as always, confidence is more important than accuracy, so don't be afraid of sacrificing accuracy to get them more confident.

You are also not shifting much the ellipses on the organic forms, so try to keep that in mind too.

Textures look pretty good, though I don't know why but you haven't filled the shadows on the second texture analysis. You are doing a good job observing and thinking in cast shadows instead of only contours, and the transitions on the gradiations are done well. Only exception is the third one, where you didn't quite managed to do the transition to complete white.

In the dissections you are doing a good job too, you are again focusing in cast shadows in most of them (though in some of them you've drawn all the contours, like the leaves), and you've made use of the silhouette to show the texture more effectively. They also wrap nicely around the forms of the organic forms.

Onto your form intersections you have a few issues. First one is that you arent drawing through the circles. In drawabox, always draw twice through the ellipses/balls, just like in lesson 1, and second, that you aren't keeping them mostly to a consistent foreshortening, to make them look as if they were on the same scene.

The main objective of this exercise is precisely that. And to make that easier, one thing that you can do is to try to make, the boxes, cylinders, and all the forms with the most shallow perspective you can make. That way, it will be easier to keep them to a consistent foreshortening.

The other secondary problem is that you aren't actually drawing your intersections, but just like I said, it's a secondary thing. So worry first about the first 2 issues I mentioned.

Lastly, organic form intersections look pretty good. You've mostly kept them to simple forms, so I can already see improvement from your first 2 organic forms exercises. The form look quite believable as 3d forms interaction with each other. Good job!

Next Steps:

So, like I said you did a pretty good job. I'm not gonna make you do more organic forms as I think you demonstrated you took a better grasp of them with the last exercise. But I'm gonna ask of you:

-1 Page of form intersections

Where I want you to make all the forms with consistent shallow foreshortening and draw through all the ellipses and balls twice. Good luck, and keep up the good work!

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
7:43 AM, Wednesday February 19th 2020

Hey Elodin thanks for the indepth critique post! Here's the excercise you requested.

https://i.imgur.com/iMfdMgd.jpg

Again thank you so much for taking the time!

8:13 AM, Wednesday February 19th 2020

Alright, thats better! You are already tackling intersections, and drawing through the ellipses. You can still push the shallow perspective a bit more, so keep it in mind when attemptong this exercise in the future.

Next Steps:

Next step is lesson 3, good luck and keep up the good work!

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete, and 2 others agree. The student has earned their completion badge for this lesson and should feel confident in moving onto the next lesson.
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