What’s up, ARATORI. I’m Swampat and I’ll be doing your lesson 1 critique. This is my first time doing one so hopefully I make this easy to understand.

Lines

Superimposed Lines

• For the really short lines you did are actually pretty good. There’s some fraying at the end of them, but that’s pretty normal.

• The longer your lines get the more you seem to arc your lines and the less they actually stay straight. The best advice I can give on that is to keep practicing moving your whole arm. I’d say the same for your curvy and purposefully arched lines.

Ghosted Lines

• You did a pretty good job getting your lines to hit/almost hit their points. There is a slight curve to a few lines near their end of their trajectory, but they’re pretty minor.

**You did pretty good here, I’d say that you should probably vary your line sizes to make it easier not to curve them. Just keep using the ghosting method as you continue the course, you’ll be able to hit those points and have less curves in no time.

**

Ghosted Planes

• These are REALLY well done! You did an amazing job getting those inside lines to almost hit or completely hit the corners of those planes.

• Your lines do slightly end up on the outside of your planes, but it’s fine for the most part. You’ll probably still end up doing that regardless of how much you practice, but if you want to practice on your own that is fine.

• Your lines also wobble a bit, but from what I’m looking at, you mostly do it when you have very little room to fit the plane you’re drawing.

  **You did really well on these, I’m extremely impressed with these. I don’t really have anything else to add outside of the slight wobble on the lines for the planes. Great job!

**

Ellipses

Table of Ellipses

• These are done pretty well for the most part, but it looks like you went over these maybe 4 or 5 times. This is a guess considering how dark these ellipses are.

• Because you go over these more than 2 to 3 times there are more lines on the inside of your ellipses. Going over your ellipses only about 2 to 3 times might lessen this.

• A lot of your ellipses overlap each other instead of just touching the edge of one another. Try to focus a little harder while you ghost your ellipses in the future, but don’t worry if they overlap too much since this can happen to even someone that practices this a lot.

Ellipses in Planes

• You did better here with the amount of times you go over your ellipses. There are a few that look like they had 4 tries, but that’s fine.

• These ellipses look like they were rushed a little more than the table of ellipses. I do see you got a decent amount pretty smooth, but a lot of these have some wobbling and a lot of space when you went over them multiple times. Make sure to keep practicing the ghosting method in your free time.

• Your ellipses miss the edges of the boxes a lot, this looks like you could have been having trouble with the positioning of your paper. When you’re ghosting make sure you rotate your paper to the most comfortable position for your arm to move.

You didn’t do a bad job on these, these just look like they needed to be at a better position for you to ghost and draw them better. The position of your paper really can improve your focus and ability to draw clean ellipses in my experience.

Funnels

• You did great getting the ellipses to touch the edges of each other consistently.

• Most of these have been gone over multiple times which make them less smooth looking. I’ll just say to remember to practice (I know I’ve said this a lot) ghosting ellipses in your free time or warmups.

• Try to widen the ellipses the further from the middle you get in your funnels and make the ones closer to the middle a more narrow.

You did a decent job on these, but the variety in ellipse wideness and narrowness is a little lacking. The ellipses are also a bit wobbly, but I’m sure you know what advice I’d give you for that, so I’ll move on.

Boxes

Plotted Perspective

• These are done well, but the inside lines and the lines that touch the horizon don’t need to be super dark, it makes things a little hard to see. The first part of your table is probably the sweet spot for these.

Rough Perspective

• A lot of your lines are far off from their target, but that’s to be expected with this. You’ll get better at seeing the target as you improve at drawing in perspective.

• Your lines wobble a few times on some of these boxes. Make sure you’re ghosting as much as you need to so you can be a bit more confident when drawing your lines.

• On the first page, on the second and third panel it looks like you tried to redraw a few of your lines. You did this a lot of the third panel of your second page too. You don’t need to do that, if you mess up on the trajectory of a line just move on. You have way more opportunities with other boxes and as long as you recognize you messed up you can remember to try not to make that same mistake again.

Rotated Boxes This assignment is supposed to be hard so this’ll be short

• You did a pretty good job on this for the most part, you still have those wobbly lines on a lot of your boxes.

• Some of your boxes, specifically nearing the bottom, become unaligned with the boxes above them.

• The boxes on the end of both the left and right get wider, so some of them don’t look like they’re converging very much.

**These are similar problems I and many others have had so don’t beat yourself up over it. You actually did a decent job on this, very impressed.

**

Organic Perspective This one is also pretty hard, but this may be a bit longer(?)

• I’m gonna start with the biggest problem I see, the line thickness seems all over the place. I understand making the lines thicker for the boxes overlapping the ones behind them, but a few of the smaller boxes also have these, so I’m guessing you were trying to fix the lines? Like I said on the rough perspectives, you don’t need to go over messed up lines, just move on.

• A few box sizes don’t make sense in a perspective sense, like the second panel of the first page, smaller boxes in the first panel of page two, most of the second panel of page two, and the bigger boxes on the last panel of page two. Make sure to think about the distance in space you make these boxes the further and closer you get in space.

• The last and most simple thing, the boxes are distorted in shape, but a pretty normal mistake from what I’ve seen myself. Just make sure you ghost carefully when doing these, the smaller boxes are a little hard to ghost, but you’ll get better with those in time.

This was the roughest one I’ve seen from you, but most of these mistakes will be improved with practice and familiarizing yourself with perspective and ghosting. You should try practicing the ghosting method while warming up to give yourself more confidence, that way you won’t feel the need to try to correct lines you messed up on.