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5:27 PM, Monday September 27th 2021

The results are a little mixed, in that there are some good signs, and some areas that still need improvement. The set as a whole is represented well by this beetle drawing, where I can see you trying to apply many of the points I raised in my previous critique, but there are some areas where you're contradicting some of the points I offered before.

I'll outline the issues below, one by one:

  • Firstly, whenever you put down any mark, you need to think about whether you're trying to introduce a new, complete, solid form, or if you're trying to add a one-off stroke to alter the silhouette of an existing element. For example, if you look at this image, I've highlighted in red some partial lines where you were altering the existing silhouette, rather than introducing a new, complete, simple structure. That last point is important - these masses we add must always be as simple as possible, and any complexity they do feature must be in direct response to interacting with the existing structure, in the manner [shown in this diagram](). Any other complexity - like for example, if you were to build a separate shell/carapace form on top of the abdomen, and it had some irregularity to its silhouette (bumps, waviness, etc.) then you would first build a simple structure on top of the abdomen, and then introduce any bumps and irregularities as their own forms on top of that.

  • Secondly, one issue I noticed quite prominently across your drawings here (in retrospect it was present in your original set too, but it wasn't as noticeable), it seems that you are not drawing through any of your ellipses two full times before lifting your pen, as discussed back in Lesson 1. Drawing through your ellipses is important, because it helps us to achieve smoother, more even elliptical shapes. In trying to nail our ellipses in one go, we end up with more rigid, uneven shapes which themselves undermine the solidity of the form we're trying to capture (due to the otherwise more complex shape, with all its bumps/wobbles). It's very important that you get used to drawing through all the ellipses you freehand in this course. Also, be sure to execute them using the ghosting method, and from your shoulder so as to engage your whole arm.

  • I can see that you are consciously trying to employ the sausage method, and for the most part you're laying down that basic structure quite well (aside from a few places where you end up drawing more stretched ellipses rather than sausages). In my critique however, I shared with you the idea that the sausage method is just the first step for laying down the basic underlying structure for the leg, and that we build upon it by introducing new forms that wrap around the given structure. I provided a number of diagrams/demonstrations for how to go about this, but I did not see you attempting to apply it in your drawings. In general, you tended to stop your drawings pretty early on, only once you'd laid down the major structures, but never delving into the smaller elements that require further observation and study of your reference to identify. You did sometimes jump into more general detail, but when you did (like on the grasshopper for instance), you seemed to be aiming more towards a general sense of "decoration" - that is, putting marks down to try and make the drawing look more complex, interesting, and impressive. Unfortunately, decoration as a goal is rather flimsy and non-specific - there's no clear point at which we've added "enough" decoration. Instead, what we're doing in this course can be broken into two distinct sections - construction and texture - and they both focus on the same concept. With construction we're communicating to the viewer what they need to know to understand how they might manipulate this object with their hands, were it in front of them. With texture, we're communicating to the viewer what they need to know to understand what it'd feel like to run their fingers over the object's various surfaces. Both of these focus on communicating three dimensional information. Both sections have specific jobs to accomplish, and none of it has to do with making the drawing look nice. It all comes back to conveying the forms that are present - capturing the constructed forms first via explicit markmaking (both large masses and smaller structures), then capturing textural forms (the ones that sit along the surface of another given structure) via implicit markmaking, as discussed back in Lesson 2. Generally speaking we capture textural marks through the use of specific cast shadow shapes, not individual one-off marks. We determine which shadow shapes we draw by thinking about the specific forms we want to convey, and thinking about how they relate to the surfaces around them. Rather than drawing what we see, we use what we see of the textures in our reference to infer where the textural forms themselves are, and that's the information we use to invent our shadow shapes.

I do think that you're moving in the right direction in some areas, but I feel that your work here suggests that you may not have had my original critique quite as fresh in your mind when doing the work - perhaps you read through it when you first received the feedback, but may not have been as mindful of it when doing the work. I really can't say for sure, but the results are that the points I raised were only partially applied.

I also noticed that where I asked for a page of organic forms and 3 pages of insect constructions, you submitted much more than was asked. In the future, please stick only to what is requested, and focus first and foremost on committing to each drawing as much time as it demands of you. I suspect that right now you may be stopping your constructions early (as I discussed above) because you may be restricting yourself to however much time you have in a given sitting - opting to start a new drawing during your next session instead.

When it comes to these exercises - keep in mind that each drawing is itself just an exercise in 3D spatial reasoning - it's important to give each drawing ample space and ample time, and to give them as much of both as the drawing requires. Don't be afraid to draw big (you have done so in some cases, while other drawings have been more cramped), and don't be afraid to break up a single drawing across multiple sittings as needed. Don't decide how long a drawing is going to take ahead of time - allow it to decide based on its own complexity. Your focus should only be on giving each and every mark as much time and attention as it requires to be executed to the best of your ability. That means employing the ghosting method for every mark, taking the time to engage your whole arm when needed, etc.

So - I'm going to assign a couple more drawings as revisions. Do not complete more than what is asked, and focus on doing your best with each and every one. That doesn't mean picking subject matter that is particularly complex or challenging either - picking simpler subject matter will help you focus more on applying the points I've raised both here and in my previous critique, without distraction.

Next Steps:

Please submit 2 more insect constructions. I'd also like you to keep track of how much time you've invested, broken up by sitting.

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
4:02 PM, Thursday September 30th 2021

When you say to draw through my ellipses twice, do you mean the basic forms I am putting down in the beginning? Or do you mean the occasional contour lines, segmentation lines, and intersection lines on legs? Or is it the contour lines on my sausage forms? I thought I wasn't supposed to be drawing around the back side of the contour lines, intersection lines, segmentation lines, and sausage form contour lines. If it is the basic forms, it makes total sense how I should implement it, but if it is about the others should I be "drawing through the form?"

6:22 PM, Thursday September 30th 2021

Honestly I can understand the confusion - we use "drawing through" in two different contexts in the course, though usually they're presented either as "draw through your ellipses two full times" and "draw through your forms". In this case, we're just talking about how back in Lesson 1, I stated that we should be drawing around every ellipse we freehand two full times before lifting the pen (as explained here).

So if what you're drawing is an ellipse, then go around the shape two full times. This will lean into your arm's natural desire to move in an elliptical shape, and will help you execute it more confidently and more evenly, while also giving you the bonus of more training for your muscle memory.

If however what you're trying to draw is not an ellipse - like if it's just a partial contour curve, or a sausage form, or anything else - then you don't need to draw through it (and shouldn't, because it'll cause what you're drawing to shift more into being elliptical instead).

I hope that clarifies things, but feel free to let me know if it doesn't.

4:30 PM, Tuesday October 19th 2021

Hi,

Here is my newest attempt at the insect follow up work you assigned:

https://imgur.com/a/h97kkNa

I was able to focus a little better this time, but my results are still fairly poor. I am having a tough time when I am visualizing and executing the major forms, and it is taking me so much time that I end up performing poorly implementing other concepts (like the sausage legs, building up of simple forms... etc). I was journaling the time I was spending, but it got out of control and I ended up losing track. I spent around a few hours a day for 10 days.

In the past I have taken a very long time to internalize things from this class. It probably took me 750 boxes to have a "break through" when I was able to have any sort of vision for a fake 3-D world. 

I seem to operate better and make bigger improvements once I start treating things as a warm-up (which happened with the boxes). 

For texture, I am not even close to being able to execute it. I get the idea behind it, but I think I will need to do the challenge before I can even get close to pulling some of these textures off.

I am open to follow whatever next steps you think I should take. 

Thank you so much for your help so far.

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