I'm sorry you're experiencing depression, but I like that you're seeking answers because that's a sign of fortitude

RIght now all I can offer is a bit of my experience. In a tangible way

Mindset:

• Compare only the past experience to your new one, that's one way of knowing where you improved

  • In regards of other peoples works, it's good to take inspirations. But also remind that confidence isn't about lowering another person so that they can shine, it's about shining together. We have a tendency to compare our weakest point to others who are good against it.

About 50%:

• The 50% isn't about fun, it can be fun if you want to. In my interpretation, it's all about putting what's in your mind to paper, without caring about techniques and how to's, etc.. you can incorporate that it you want to, but the line is that if it paralyzes you, set it aside until you feel you like it's more of a tool than a wall.

  • The 50% has different interpretations of fun, some might have fun doodling, heck maybe drawing mechs, or even something abstract like putting emotions into form and expression. And guess what, it changes every time because we change. Just because something is fun before doesn't mean it's fun now. Think of the 50% like an exploration what might be fun for you. It might not be clear now, but you will be able to find fun that is right for you.

  • If you're having a hard time, try to draw what you want to draw or what's in your mind. It can be anything, it doesn't have to be good because it's not a "Project" it's about 50%. See this as a guide: Draw your best as to where your current abilities is. No pressure, just draw what's in your mind.

You're not alone in this, you're already doing something brave. Keep going, but on your own pace.

(I apologize if it looks like a wall of text)

Hi bro.

After reading what you wrote, I want you to know that you are not alone in this. I completely understand how you're feeling – that frustration and the sense that instead of moving forward, you're actually falling behind. Honestly, I've been through something very similar myself, that feeling of "I don't even know how to draw for fun anymore." It's a disheartening moment, and it's easy to feel tempted to just give up. But I'm here to tell you: don't give up just yet. It's much easier said than done, I know, but you have my support, and I'm sure you have the support of many others who are on the same path here.

The 50/50 Rule: Your Canvas, Your Rules

You mentioned the 50/50 rule and how you feel like you're not doing the "fun" part. In my opinion, that rule is a guideline, not a rigid obligation. Some people enjoy exploring lines and letting their imagination run wild spontaneously, but there are others, like you and me, who want things to "turn out well."

If the "drawing for fun" part is causing you more stress than enjoyment right now, don't pressure yourself. You can interpret that rule in your own way. If what makes you feel good and helps you progress is focusing on the fundamentals that Drawabox teaches you, then do it! Every line, every box you draw, no matter how "bad" you think it is, is a step forward. You're building a solid foundation that will allow you to draw anything you want in the future. It's like learning a musical instrument; at first, it's scales and exercises, but they'll lead you to play your favorite songs.

Drawing Is Hard, But Fundamentals Are Key

Drawing is incredibly challenging, no doubt about it. But the vast majority of artists you admire learned thanks to consistent practice of the fundamentals. So, the fact that you do one activity from this course every day is already a huge accomplishment. It might seem like small progress right now, but believe me, in the future, that foundation will be gigantic.

Your Dream Is Valid and Achievable

I understand that struggling with depression can make these feelings of emptiness and frustration even harder to deal with. It's heartbreaking to feel like your dream of learning to draw is slipping away. But I want you to know that your dream is absolutely valid and achievable. There's no such thing as a "negative" level in art; there's only a starting point and a path of continuous growth.

If, right now, or in the future, you're interested in professional drawing, a resource you could explore is the curriculum at https://www.soloartcurriculum.com/ . But for now, focus on taking it one step at a time.

One Step at a Time and Necessary Breaks

The important thing is to keep moving forward, step by step. And if you feel overwhelmed or tired, remember to take necessary breaks. Making a little progress each day is fantastic, even if that progress seems minimal to you. It's not about speed, but about consistency.

Sending you a big hug. You have my support on this journey. Keep going, don't give up!

Others have gotten into the point that the 50% rule is not about doing what is fun right now, but rather facing that frustration head-on so as to remove its power and to develop the capacity to enjoy drawing further down the road, so I won't further beat that horse.

I will mention however that what I show in that video is not me as a beginner. The sketchbook I flip through there is something I drew in 2012. I started drawing as a hobby a good ten years and more before that. Rather, this section from the Lesson 0 page that discusses the 50% rule shows examples from when I was a beginner.

The thing is, looking out at the world with depression is like looking through a messy, dusty window that hasn't been cleaned in ages. What you see isn't an accurate reflection of what's actually there - rather, it's twisted by the depression you're forced to look through. And so, when you see drawings done by other people, you tell yourself what their story is. You tell yourself that it didn't take that much effort, that they're basically beginners, that you should be able to achieve what they do right this second, and if you can't, that you're somehow a failure.

But none of that reflects reality - and so, the realizations you think you're forming right now are also not rooted in the world around you. They're rooted in the glass through which you're looking at the world, and all of the stains and grime that covers it. And, as noted in this section from the 50% rule material, I hope you are seeking help for that specifically.

I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with depression. I hope you are able to find relief for that.

I don't think the way you feel about your current ability to draw is unique. Probably many people on this forum feel that way too. When I decided to learn how to draw, I actually was a little smug about it and thought I had some talent. Then rather quickly learned I had no idea what I was doing nor did I even know how to start learning. Drawabox was one of the first sites that actually started where I was, at 0 (maybe negative). It's really easy to forget that every talented artist you see started by drawing like crap. And then they kept drawing. I had the oppurtunity to talk to a famous comic artist about how he started and he said he was always that kid who drew pictures, even when he should have been doing something else. I am sure that if you looked at those early pictures, you would not be impressed. But he kept drawing. Every talented artist, no matter how good they are now, started at 0.

I do have a suggestion for drawing for fun. The drawing prompts here on Drawabox are a great starting point. They can be a bit involved though, so there are many other sites with daily drawing prompts. They are very helpful as a starting point when you are facing a blank page. Do some drawings (I wouldn't put any pressure on yourself to draw a certain number of pages) and then...turn the page. You have a fresh start. Keep those pages though. Look at them much later to see your growth. And there will be growth.

Comparing yourself to others, especially people who have spent years and years practicing, will only make you discouraged.

Hey there, I think you must be having a tough time at the moment. Please, don't give up, especially if learning how to draw is your dream. Look at you, you're even doing the challenge! I've known people who have difficulties finishing the first lesson, and you have done it, Basics Brawler!!!

So to your question. Is there something that you really like in real life? It can be anything. Do you like horses, birds, cars? I would say, try to focus on these things that you love to your core. In my case, I started learning how to draw because I love historical military units, like the roman legionaries etc. So if I thought about drawing dogs, I would cringe and think "drawing is not fun", but the possibility to create my own warriors made me want to draw. (I think you get the idea).

As for being the beginner of the beginners. Most people start there. I started there for sure, drawing ugly soldiers, bad perspective, chicken-scratches all the way. But know this: you WILL improve. Your brain already has powerful visual processing components. Learning how to draw is simply learning how to translate that into the sheet of paper. It takes time, but that's it. Trust me, you WILL improve. Just keep going.

I struggle with depression and coming up with ideas to draw as well. I think the root of my problem is an overactive inner critic. If you are like me, I suspect that ideas of what to draw are occuring to you but you are dismissing them almost immediately as just bad ideas.

They could very well be bad ideas but you don't get to the good ideas without going through a lot of bad ones. If you are always shutting down those bad ideas your mind never feels free enough to be the amount of playful required to think of the fun/good ideas. Drawing a bad picture doesn't have to be a big deal if you don't let it.

It can be helpful to have a specific project or goal you want to work on in mind. As an example, I work on indie games as a hobby as well. Depending what I am working on entails developing more story, world building, and/or just cosmetic themes. A lot of times that helps me think of something I can draw.

If you have interest in writing or enjoy a particular genre of media those could serve similar purposes as well. Make fan art of that media or make original characters/creatures/cultures/etc from your writing.

To my mind this is at least part of what people mean when they say limitations breed creativity. Limitations aren't really obstacles but instead are often handholds that can help guide you.

Find random things around the house that you can draw. Don't think too deeply about if it something you want to draw or not, just draw it. The second an object stands out you commit to drawing it and don't succumb to second guessing. After a while you could go to thrift stores or garage sales and find cheap things to draw as well.

Prompt challenges can be helpful but not all prompts suit everybody. I find concrete prompts help me more than the abstract ones.

I struggled with this for a while as well. Now I just try not to care too much because other people who are better have been doing this for year. Then there's the occasional 14 year old (Im 25) who blows my art out of the water. But that's on social media and I used see them when I doom scrolled on tik tok or instagram a lot but not so much anymore. I just bury my head in the paper and make something. I heard this quote "Make it exist for now, you can perfect it later" I really like that quote. Make sure you keep ALL your sketchbooks too, I wish I had. Believe me, one day youre gonna look back and think, damn I really improved. You just gotta get over wanting to be perfect and put the time in. I always say that drawing is making ONE really good drawing for every like 100 or so drawings. Of course that's just kind of a metaphor, but when I was starting out (im not a veteran btw i only have like 2-3 years under my belt) IT REALLY FELT LIKE THAT. NOTHING I made was good and then there was the occasional drawing that looked alright. Draw Sessions on youtube helped me a lot. And Im sorry if this felt like I was rambling, definitely not as structured as the other replies. I just wanted to reply because I felt exactly what you're feeling. It is not fun, and it ruined drawing for me for some time.