What’s up, PAMDA. I’m Swampat and I’ll be doing your lesson 1 critique.

Lines

Superimposed Lines

So, I’m noticing that a majority of your lines are very wobbly and fray out at the beginning and end of your lines. Your vertical lines are better than all the other lines, but they still fray on both ends. The S shaped lines aren’t really too big of a deal since those are harder to align with each other, but you really should work on that fraying issue.

You need to start each new set of lines with a straight line to use as a guide. It looks like you forgot to do that and just free handed all the horizontal, diagonal, and vertical lines. The first line for each set should use a ruler (or the straight line tool) so you have a guide, then you free hand the rest.

I think you might need to practice moving your whole arm to build more confidence and move your arm a little faster. Your lines will also fray naturally, but the beginning of your lines shouldn’t fray out similarly to the ends of your lines.

I would like you to redo the diagonal, horizontal, and vertical lines, but this time use the straight line tool as your first line for each set, that way freehanding the rest of your lines in each set will be easier.

Ghosted Lines

You did a pretty good job getting your lines to hit/almost hit their points, but there’s one big problem I’m noticing. Your vertical and horizontal lines are wobbly, arc and tend to slightly overshoot pretty often. The few diagonal lines you did are actually fairly smooth and straight.

Your dots don't need to be that big and spiraled(?), just apply some pressure with your drawing tool and that should be enough to create a small dot.

Make sure when you start ghosting, to move your arm as many times as you need to until you truly feel confident to put those lines down. The wobbly and arched feel like they were rushed and caused you to wobble. I think you did a good job at only doing one line and moving on to the next even after making mistakes, I struggled with trying to redo my messed up lines.

Ghosted Planes

These are done pretty well honestly. Your lines are less wobbly and more arched, but that shows some improvement.

Your X lines do overshoot outside of the planes often (not a big deal especially since this is the first lesson), though your vertical and horizontal lines do a good job hitting their points despite the arching.

One other thing you need to add are the dots for the lines that make a +.

You did pretty good on these, just need to do some practicing on your own to improve on getting less of those arches.

Ellipses

Table of Ellipses

The first thing I’m noticing with your ellipses is that they all seem to be rushed. When I say they look rushed, I’m not sure if you remember to try your best not to make a spiral. The lines are supposed to overlap to make your ellipses look as smooth as possible, instead it looks like you’re either ghosting too fast or not ghosting enough and it makes your ellipses look messy.

The second issue is not using the table as a boundary and your ellipses are supposed to touch each other, not cross into one another. This issue is a little hard for me to give advice on, but try to remember to be aware of the table and the ellipses when you’re ghosting. If you can keep that in mind, you might be able to make them more organized looking.

Your ellipses some time get wider or thinner on one end instead of keeping the same consistent size. The rounder ellipses should stay round and smooth and your thin ellipses should stay thin, not get rounder on one end.

The last thing I can point out is the heaviness of your marks, but that might be a pressure issue since you did these digitally.

Ellipses in Planes

You basically have the same problem of not being aware of the surrounding boundary of the planes.

One thing I can say you’ve done better at is keeping your ellipses a lot cleaner this time. Even though they don’t touch all 4 sides of the planes, your ellipses don’t spiral as much as the ones in your tables.

You need to practice doing ghosting ellipses, I’d say to do your tables of ellipses again, but your planes are at least passable. Ellipses are pretty hard to get used to, so don’t feel too bad about not doing amazing on these.

Funnels

You did a good job of getting the ellipses to touch the edges of each other rather than them crossing into one another. You also did a decent job of keeping them inside your funnels too.

You’ve done better at avoiding spiraling with these, you still have some that spiral instead of being smooth, but you’re obviously improving. Good job on these!

Try to widen the ellipses the further from the middle you get inside your funnels. You kept all the ellipses thin regardless of how far from the middle you got.

Your minor axis (the line in the middle of your funnels) should cut through the whole funnel to make them easier to see. Also, some of your ellipses don't line up with the minor axis, they turn in a different direction instead of alligning with the minor axis.

One last thing, make sure you use some kind of tool to make sure your curves for the funnels stay smooth. Some of your funnel curves look like they were freehanded instead of using a tool, at least thats what I get from some of the wobbly curves.

You did a lot better on the smoothness of your ellipses, but the variety in ellipse wideness and narrowness is lacking. You still do make spirals, but they don’t seem rushed like your other ellipses, maybe a lack of confidence after you ghosted. Make sure to practice ghosting ellipses to improve your confidence.

Boxes

Plotted Perspective

Biggest issue here is the wobbly lines. It looks like you used the straight line tool for the lines that go back to the horizon line, but for some reason not for the actual boxes? You're supposed to use a ruler (or in your case, the straight line tool) for all the boxes. You should also use a blank paper/canvas instead of that lined paper(?).

You should also have three frames to put your boxes in like how they're shown in the assignment https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/19/example.

I would like you redo these on a blank canvas and use your straight line too for the whole assignment. Nothing in this specific assignment needs to be freehanded.

Rough Perspective

You did better on these, but in your first page you should use your straight line tool for the rectangular frames you put your boxes in. The horizon line should also use a straight line tool and not be freehanded. You also forgot to put those lines for your boxes that lead back to the horizon line on your first two frames.

I think you should label your assignments to make it a little easier for me to tell which assignment is which. I thought your plotted perspective was your rough perspective until I saw the dots on the rough perspective assignment. Also, all the different colors in your plotted perspective are a little hard to see.

Your width and height lines should remain perpendicular to the horizon line. Basically what I'm trying to say is that a lot of your lines are pretty slanted.

Since you did these digitally, could you use the straight line tool to fix the first two rectangular frames to have straight lines along with their horizon lines (they should look like the frames here https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/19/example). You need put those red lines that lead back to the horizon line for those first two frames on the first page as well.

Rotated Boxes This assignment is supposed to be hard so this’ll be short

Your box's perspective warps a lot when you get to the corners, this is normal since this is super hard to do.

You struggle with actually changing the angle of your boxes. A lot of your boxes don’t look like they’re turning in perspective or turned at a really weird angle. The boxes in the middle going vertically are decent, but everything else either doesn’t turn in a way to show perspective correctly or they’re just drawn very janky. This is a pretty common issue for me and many others so this isn't something to get too caught up on.

I would like for you to redo the boxes I've circled in red here https://imgur.com/a/Rbl6F1J and the blue ones are just boxes that don't need to be there. They don't have to be perfect, but try your best to make them look a little better.

Organic Perspective This one is also pretty hard, but this may be a bit longer(?)

It’s a little hard to tell what boxes are supposed to be closer in space. The small boxes are fine, but as you try to make the boxes look closer they don’t really get all that much bigger in size in comparison to the box that’s supposed to be behind the larger box.

You’re going over your lines a lot and it’s making judging where some of the boxes are supposed to be in space. Going over your lines multiple times also makes your lines look a bit messy as well.

The shape of your boxes are a bit wonky at times. This is a common mistake, but try to be aware of the placement of your points and lines when drawing your boxes.

Your heavy line weight should be saved for the boxes that are supposed to be getting closer in space to the viewer. You should also make boxes that are in front of another box have darker lines, this way you can tell that one box is in front of the box behind it.

I’m sorry I don’t have many tips on how to fix your mistakes on these last two assignments, I struggled with these too and the best way I was able to get them don’t decently was by rewatching the instruction videos. I don’t think it’s completely necessary to redo this one, but if you did that would be nice.

Final Thoughts

You need to practice ghosting to improve your confidence. This will lessen the chance of wobbling and feeling the need to fix mistakes.

I can't edit the "Next Steps" section so I'll put the assignments I want you to redo here.

Superimposed Lines: I would like you to redo the diagonal, horizontal, and vertical lines, but this time use the straight line tool as your first line for each set, that way freehanding the rest of your lines in each set will be easier.

Plotted Perspective: I would like you redo these on a blank canvas and use your straight line too for the whole assignment. Nothing in this specific assignment needs to be freehanded. You should also have three frames to put your boxes in like how they're shown in the assignment https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/19/example.

Rough Perspective: Since you did these digitally, could you use the straight line tool to fix the first two rectangular frames to have straight lines along with their horizon lines (they should look like the frames here https://drawabox.com/lesson/1/19/example). You need put those red lines that lead back to the horizon line for those first two frames on the first page as well.

Rotated Boxes: I would like for you to redo the boxes I've circled in red here https://imgur.com/a/Rbl6F1J and the blue ones are just boxes that don't need to be there. They don't have to be perfect, but try your best to make them look a little better.

Optional

Organic Perspective: I'd like you to fix the box sizes for the ones that are supposed to be getting closer to the viewer. They don't get big enough to feel like they're getting closer.

Try not to rush these, it’s really frustrating to do these assignments, but if you just try your best you’ll notice improvements pretty quickly.

HOPEFULLY THE WEBSITE DOESN'T DELETE ALL MY ADDITIONS THIS TIME.

ignore this