12:41 PM, Monday July 26th 2021
Congratulations on finishing lesson 2 ! You've done a good job overall. There are a few things that you might want to keep in mind that I will list out in the critique, but you'll get them as you practice these exercises again in the future. But apart from this, feel free to move on to lesson 3.
Organic arrows: You've done a fairly good job with the arrows. The arrows are pretty hesitant, but that's okay, they will improve with practice. I see that you made clear effort to add depth to the arrows, even if the ones on the first page look a bit shallow, the second page came out much better. Keep practicing these for more confidence.
Organic forms : First things first : good job keeping the forms simple. There is some wobble however in your marks, but that is something i suspect will get better with practice. Moving on to the contours themselves, they are pretty good. In the contour ellipses, the ellipses change degrees like they should and they look reasonable for the most part. You have cases where the ellipses are way off the axis, so try to work on that. Don't rush the exercise. Rushing is probably the easiest way to ensure ellipses that don't line up. The contour curves are okay. Some of them are way flatter than they should like in the middle form at the rightmost edge. In that form, the small contour ellipse at the top and the contour line below it give an impression of a top down view of the form, but the contour lines following it are way too flat for that. But other than that you do a good job. The contours don't spill outside the actual form and they are more or less aligned to the axis, except in like one or two cases.
Texture Analysis: You do a fairly decent job here. The paper texture is especially good. You do have some problems with the texture fading into the dark however. In the scales, the way you make the scratches is pretty impressive, I like how you leave a clean space in the middle to show the round form. You could have done a better job with fading it into black however. The portion of the scale in light remains the same even as you progress from light to dark when it should have become smaller as the scales before occlude more of the light hitting the scales the follow into the darker side. A similar things would go for the folds in the elephant skin. You need to have more and biddr shadows in the darker side. Simply increasing the number of pores isn't enough.
Dissections: I think you do a really good job here. You take good care to push and break the silhouette when necessary and the textures wrap around nicely. I'd say that you could have pushed the sillhouete more in the lower half of the leaf texture you made at the end. The upper half has a boldsilhoutette but the lower half feels very flat in comparison. Great work anyway!
Form intersections: You have done a good job with the perspective here. I feel like the foreshortening is consistent throughout the scenes here. You do struggle with the actual intersections in places, but that's okay for the most part. Remember that the intersection line turns sharply at a corner if the intersection plane changes. You have a few instances where you don't do that. Also know that a flat plane intersects with a sphere to give a circular interesection, or atleast a part of a circle if the plane doesnt cut the sphere entirely. You've missed this in te intersection between a pyramid and a sphere on the last page, so I thought I'd let you know.
Organic Intersections: Done really well I must say. The piles feel stable. You have a few instances where the cast shadows dont follow the surfaces they are cast on exactly (like the cast shadow of the topmost form on the spaces between the two forms it is on (in the first page)) , but that's okay
Overall, great submission. I think you are good to go onto the next lesson.
Next Steps:
Lesson 3