7:44 PM, Sunday July 3rd 2022
Hey, congratulations on completing your homework on this lesson!
I'll try to be concise in reviewing it:
The strokes look good overall, very fluid and have this sense of depth we're looking for.
Also, I like how you confidently overlap the lines to create the folds.
The lineweight looks well applied, used only in the areas that overlap others.
- The general shape of the "sausages" is fine.
Some, like on the second page, are perhaps too complex.
I'll leave this guide for you to notice (https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/5/simplesausage) ; none of them should deflate in the middle or have too many undulations.
- Regarding the ellipses and contour curves, they are not bad at all.
Their degree (thickness) changes respectively to their position, and they are well aligned to their axis as well.
- The study of your textures looks concise. It's good that you're only focusing on drawing the shadows.
Additionally, the extension of the textures from dark to light looks appropriate.
If you have time, take a look at this image to get better results later: https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/7d1f3467.jpg
- The texture here looks phenomenal. You're rolling it over the shape and, focusing on the shadows correctly.
//: That water texture looks spectacular, by the way.
- First I'll mention that you're lacking that consistency that allows all the shapes to look within the same scene.
Such consistency is achieved by drawing your shapes with a much shallower foreshortening.
We can remedy this with a little practice.
- Otherwise your shapes look good, the process for drawing them is adequate.
The line hatching you apply to the bases of each shape makes them look more solid.
These last ones look pretty good. The drawing process and the lines look adequate.
I will also take the opportunity to remind you to avoid drawing those slightly deflated sausages in the middle (like the one on the far right, on the first page).
I'll leave you some homework to correct.
Read the critique patiently and ask questions if you have any doubts!
- 1 page of intersections of shapes.
It can be just boxes; but try to draw them with a much shallower foreshortening.
11:37 PM, Wednesday July 6th 2022
Thank you so much for the critique Chayota!
I have read it all and it was super helpfull, i will surely give attention to the pointers that you gave!
I took some time to practice the form intersections. After much struggle, i'm seeing a little improvement:
- 1 Page of Intersections of Shapes: https://imgur.com/a/F85kpq8
12:00 PM, Thursday July 7th 2022
Notice how you managed to make all the boxes belong to the same scene; this was not very noticeable before.
You understood what was necessary, so I'll mark your lesson as complete :)