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11:52 PM, Friday September 2nd 2022

I'll be the TA handling your Lesson 2 critique.

You're making progress towards understanding the concepts introduced in this lesson and hopefully this critique will help you in your future attempts.

  • Starting off in the arrows section your lines are looking smoothly and confidently drawn. There are spots where your arrows bulge/narrow suddenly, this is an issue because it gives the impression that your arrows are stretching which hurts their solidity. Remember that as our arrows move closer to the viewer we want them to widen consistently. It's good to see that you're trying to implement line weight, just remember that you want to keep your applications subtle and you'll become consistent with mileage. here are some things to look out for when applying it. At times you don't overlap your edges when you should, this results in your arrows flattening out as you can see here. I'd like you to experiment more with foreshortening in your future attempts, by utilizing it in both the arrows themselves as well as the negative space between their curves we can create a stronger illusion of an object moving through 3D space as demonstrated here.

  • Moving into the organic forms with contours exercise your forms are getting a bit too complex. We want to create our forms with both ends being the same size and to avoid any pinching, bloating, or stretching along the form's length as discussed here. Some of your line work here shows a lack of confidence, remember that our first priority is that we want all of our linework/ellipses/contours to be drawn confidently and mileage will improve our accuracy. Speaking of contours I'd like you to try and shift the degree of your contours more. The degree of a contour line basically represents the orientation of that cross-section in space, relative to the viewer, and as we slide along the sausage form, the cross section is either going to open up (allowing us to see more of it) or turn away from the viewer (allowing us to see less), as shown here.

  • In the texture exercises you're focusing largely on outlines and negative space rather than cast shadows created by forms along the texture itself. This makes it difficult to create gradients with implied information which we could then use to create focal points in more complex pieces, by doing so we can prevent our viewers from being visually overwhelmed with too much detail. You also show that you're drawing from memory rather than giving yourself enough time to focus on your reference. Most of our time when doing exercises like this will be spent observing our reference and looking away for a quick second to add something to our page. For more on the importance of focusing on cast shadows read here. I'd also like to quickly direct you to this image which shows that when we're working with thin line like textures if we outline and fill the shadow we will create a much more dynamic texture than simply drawing lines.

  • It's quite common for people to feel like they don't fully grasp the form intersections exercise, if you feel like you may fall into this category try not to stress too much. This exercise is just meant to get students to start thinking about how their forms relate to one another in 3D space, and how to define those relationships on the page. That being said, your forms here appear a quite wobbly and hesitant at times. It looks like you may not be utilizing the ghosting method as well as you could be. Remember that we want to take our time planning and ghosting our mark before lowering our pen and executing our mark in a single confident stroke as described here.. While there are a number of forms here it's also important to remember that whether our goal is to draw 1 form or 100, we want to be giving each line the same amount of time planning/ghosting before drawing it.

  • While wrapping up your submission with the organic intersections exercise you demonstrate that your understanding of 3D space is improving as your forms begin to wrap around one another. When attempting this again in the future I recommend drawing fewer but larger forms, you have a lot going on in these 2 attempts and it makes it much more difficult for the viewer and for yourself to keep track of what's going on, aim for large quality forms over quantity. Addressing the points mentioned in the previous organic forms section will help you here as well. When it comes to your shadows you're pushing them enough so that they cast rather than just hugging the form that creates them which is a great start. It appears like your shadows aren't following a consistent light source, I recommend pushing your light source to the top left or right corner of the page to start with, it's easier than working with a light directly above your form pile.

I won't be moving you on to the next lesson just yet, each lesson builds upon each other and I'd like to make sure you understand a few of these concepts a bit more before potentially creating more problems down the road.

With that being said I'd like you to please re-read and complete:

  • 1 page of the organic forms with contour lines exercise

  • 2 pages of the form intersections exercise

Once you've completed the pages mentioned above reply to this critique with a link to them, I'll go over them and address anything that needs to be worked on and once you've shown you're ready for the next lesson I'll move you on.

I look forward to seeing your work.

Next Steps:

Please re-read and complete:

  • 1 page of the organic forms with contour lines exercise

  • 2 pages of the form intersections exercise

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
7:23 PM, Monday September 5th 2022

https://imgur.com/a/ZMkEkV5

I know I screwed up on the sausage form facing towards the viewer. That probably made the exercise more complicated than it needed to be. In general I focused on drawing fewer forms and spending more time on each on these pages.

8:43 PM, Monday September 5th 2022

Much better overall, good work.

Remember to overshoot your contour curves so that they hook back into the form as shown here.

Other than that your forms are simpler and your linework is looking tidier, with more mileage you'll continue to improve so I'll be marking your submission complete.

Keep practicing previous exercises in you warm ups and best of luck in lesson 3.

Next Steps:

Move on to lesson 3.

This critique marks this lesson as complete.
3:11 AM, Tuesday September 6th 2022

Thank you so much for the response on the holiday. It was not expected. Have a good one!

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