2 users agree
3:45 PM, Thursday August 3rd 2023
edited at 4:26 PM, Aug 3rd 2023

Hi Simone123, I've taken a look at your work and I have a couple of comments to make.

Contour Curves and Ellipses

Some things about your contour curves and ellipses;

You've drawn a lot of curves and ellipses in your sausages. I understand that the more you draw the more you'll understand, but I feel like you could get a lot more mileage out of this exercise through playing with your forms a lot more. Try varying the degrees of the ellipses and curves (check out lesson 1 to see what I mean), playing with the idea that these sausages twist and turn in space. Drawing less ellipses and curves in each sausage would give you more room to play around with these concepts.

I would also say to make sure to accentuate the "swing-back" part of your contour curves. Some of them do this, but some of them don't. Remember, these curves run along the surface of the sausages. These little hooks help emphasize the idea that the side of the form that isn't facing us is also curved, which is important to keep in mind if you want to make your forms feel solid.

Insect Drawings

In some of your insects (especially your ladybug and your mantis), I've noticed that some of your lines are wobbly, or appear to be gone over multiple times. Take your time with your marks, plan them out, ghost them; do what ever you need to make them look as smooth and accurate (to what you want them to be) as possible. I've noticed this the most in the ladybug (in its spherical body) and the mantis (in its legs).

In your tarantula drawing, the legs' forms contradict themselves and end up feeling a little flat. An important thing to think about is how every form relates to each other. This means thinking about things like how forms connect to each other, which ones appear to be ontop of each other, etc. We use things like highlighted lines and cast shadows to reinforce what you see. I think you've highlighted some parts of your sausages too much, as they don't well establish a "visual hierarchy" (something that could help you tell how forms interact with each other). These things weren't the strict focus with making the legs (that being capturing their sense of flow), but it's something good to consider. Here's an image that hopefully clears things up a little bit.

Your other drawings don't have this problem to a great extent; they demonstrate the understanding of how forms can overlap with each other. Going forward, I would recommend to be very careful on how you highlight your lines. Remember that you're trying to create an illusion that everything you're seeing on the page isn't made of flat lines, rather tangible 3-D shapes. Highlighting parts of a form that aren't visible makes the form as a whole feel a little flat. Try to emphasize where you can visually see each form cut into the other, not where you can't.

Texture and Additional Forms

In your mantis drawing, I noticed that the shapes resembling flakes that sit under the arm seem to be drawn without any thought to them. If you zoom into the your reference for the mantis, you would see that these bumps have variations to them, with some being longer and some being shorter. Make sure to include details like these whenever you go out of your way to add smaller details to a drawing- it helps to better sell the nature of your subject.

Another thing I want to point out is how one of the segments of the arm has a little bump to the end of it- something that you didn't represent in your construction. It's good to start thinking about how you can include more complicated forms like these bumps in your constructions. The sausage form you have right now serves as a good base to add on to, so I implore you to do so. You could start by imagining that the bump in the arm is like another form being stuck onto your sausage form. Doing this allows you to gradually build up complexity in the forms that you create, allowing you to make more complex-looking things.

Misc

A final point that I would like to make might be a lighting problem, but it looks like these were done in pencil. If it isn't, then ignore this section of my comment. Ink is recommended as a tool for Drawabox as its permanent marks force us to think more about how we lay our marks on the page.

I am going to mark your post as complete. Make sure to continue to think about how all of the forms you draw sit in 3-D space and how they interact with each other. Going forward, make sure to take your time when doing all of the exercises, and try your best to capture the solidity of what you're looking at.

Next Steps:

  • move onto lesson 5
This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete, and 2 others agree. The student has earned their completion badge for this lesson and should feel confident in moving onto the next lesson.
edited at 4:26 PM, Aug 3rd 2023
0 users agree
7:42 PM, Monday August 28th 2023
edited at 7:46 PM, Aug 28th 2023

Hello Simone

edited at 7:46 PM, Aug 28th 2023
1 users agree
7:45 PM, Monday August 28th 2023

Hello Simone am here to drop some critics on your submission.

  1. Organic form. The ellipse drawn in the sausage form doesn't have degrees to them and there are too much ellipses in them, lots of you sausages are too flat there's no curvature to them. I advise you to go back to written explanation and check how to do it right

  2. Organic form: even tho you're not asked to draw the full ellipse that doesn't mean it's not a full ellipse, think of the form as something fluffy and let the contour lines wrap (contour line ) around it. And imagine the real ellipse and the draw a line that wraps around the sausage in the degrees of the ellipse

  3. The insect drawings without texture: your initial blocking of the insect form, the sausage for the legs in some of your drawings all looks flat, note: the form isn't just there for you to draw on the page and then stack flat shapes on it or contour lines you need to think of it as actually circle everything you draw will wrap around this shape, every addition form, contour lines should wrap perfectly around it to avoid ending with a flat drawing and for the legs you didn't draw a sausage form for some, you draw a normal ellipse which makes the insect looks stiff and I think you rushed this, if you really want to improve your drawings you need to focus a lot on the explanation, one step at a time no rushing you can spend a month on doing it that's fine but don't dwell on it too much but make sure you're doing the assignments as explained.

  4. Insect with texture: the spider drawing you ignored the construction of the abdomen while adding texture to it, note: texture isn't really necessary, your construction is what really matters if there's a mistake there leave it and add the textures to it that way , this is to avoid confusion the viewer, and I can also see lots of chicken scratches and cross hatching on your drawings, I advise you to revisit the ghosting lines in lesson 1 and other lessons on it, cross hatching isn't permitted.

    After finishing ever assignments make sure you use them as warm ups 2 or 3 lessons everyday for 15 min, and apply the 50/50 rule. Wishing you luck on your art journey

Next Steps:

2 page of organic form 1 with ellipse and the other with contour lines

2 page of insects construction only

1 page of insects with texture

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
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