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3:41 PM, Friday March 13th 2020

Arrows look good, but they got a few issues: They have a slight wobble, specially at the overlaps (remember that even when adding lineweight to them you should do it with a confident stroke with your shoulder, ghosting it).

Try not to rush hatching as well, and to improve their feeling of 3d, you could make them grow more exponentially.

Sausages look pretty good, some of them have a very slight pinch or are a bit pointy, but I think you're aware of it. Just in case, remember that sausages should be formed by 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width. Main problem I can see is that your ellipses aren't shifting much, try to be more aware of how the contour behave in 3d space. I recommend going through the mistakes section of the exercise, and feel free to ask me again if you still got doubts.

Texture analysis looks good, though I can see some scratchy lines. When drawing the cast shadows, fill them with areas of black, being careful not to leave any white dots and that the shadows you drew are smooth. Good job too in the gradations, though the transition from black is a bit too sudden, try to make it smoother.

InDissections I think you are focusing too much on drawing the contours of the forms. Remember that we should only be drawing cast shadows, nothing else. So you shouldn't outline every form you can see. Here as well, try not to leave white dots between the shadows.

Form intersections Careful with the foreshortening. This exercise's main objective is to draw forms in a way that makes the viewer think they exist in the same space. To do that, every form should have consistent foreshortening with the other forms. To accomplish that easier, you can make most of your forms to have shallow foreshortening. Your lines also overshoot quite a bit, and others have fraying quite a bit, which suggest me you might be rushing the exercise. It's a hard exercise, but don't rush it, if you are starting to rush, take a break and come back later.

Organic intersections look mostly believable, but they have a few issues. The first one is that you are using complex forms. Try to stick only to simple ones, no really long sausages with curves and no squished sausages. And the other one is that you haven't used shadows at all.

Next Steps:

Alright, so before marking this as complete I want to see 1 more page of organic intersections and another page of form intersections, be sure to do your best on each one and not to rush them. I recommend watching the organic intersections demo before attempting it, as well as reading through the sausages section again.

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
7:54 AM, Monday March 16th 2020

https://imgur.com/a/yF3QO34

Thanks for your critique, I really appreciate it.

Had a look at the organic intersections video again, and I feel like I got it a bit better this time. Probably rushing too quickly to end the lesson the first time. Added in shadows this time, and I think it looks a lot better.

Form intersections in general kind of went over my head, to be honest.

Had another look at sausages again too, but I think I'll have to add more to my warmups.

9:36 PM, Monday March 16th 2020

Those look much better! For the organic intersections you could still push the shadows a bit more, and try to push smooth the borders of the shadows, they are a bit rough.

Try also to think about how the sausages interact with each other, for example, the one on the left doesn't change at all when it stops being on top of the sausage on it's right.

Noted a few of those things here.

Next Steps:

Alright, so you're making good progress so I'm marking this as complete, great job! Your next step is lesson 3, good luck!

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete, and 2 others agree. The student has earned their completion badge for this lesson and should feel confident in moving onto the next lesson.
10:59 PM, Monday March 16th 2020

Cool, thank you again.

I'll have to try adjusting the sausage shape in future, I wasn't sure how to go about it without it looking too scuffed.

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