Hello!
Starter: If I ask for revision, it doesn't mean you are wrong. I just feel the need for you to improve so I am asking for revision, thats all.
Overall Review:
Something seems off in Contour Lines section. Form intersection are good, but not clear, very confusing.
Main element line weight missing.
Detailed Review:
Contour Lines:
Ribbon movement in 3D space missing, no flow. Organic form contour lines seems off.
Organic Arrows:
Well you tried and it's normal to not understand at the first go. Few things i would definitely want to point out:
1.Your arrows don't show the effect of "moving in 3D", they are kinda flat against the plane of paper. You should believe that your arrows are 3D, then you make the necessary changes. Why am I so hell bent on your arrows looking as if they are floating in plane because, these arrows are very useful in your plants for your next lesson.
Your inward turn should match your outward turn ( as specified here https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/4/overlap). Don't be afraid to overlap your curves, as they will give you the required result. It's alright don't worry you will get it right!
Also, I know understanding perspective is difficult, but you shouldn't be afraid to apply it ( mistake specified in this https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/4/perspective). We are here to learn not to draw pretty drawings
Lastly I would like to you to read this organic arrow topic, see the video once again, understand it and then try one page of organic arrows (Organic arrows: https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/organicarrows).
Organic Forms with Contour Lines:
In contour ellipses, you degree should reduce as you come near to the middle ( stated in this https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/5/ellipses). Your degree pf eclipses is quite large. Also, in contour line your "hooking" the contour line around the form is just beyond necessary. Make planned and calculated marks or curve as they can hinder your illusion. Now, here you have hooked your lines too much inside the sausage. They are looking shabby and carelessly made. Make it more calculated, you will get the desire result ( in this look at image and notice the small sausages marked as not to do, you will understand it https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/5/curves). For your better understanding I would like you to do one page of Organic forms with contour lines with changes
Texture and Detail:
Good try, keep it up!
Texture Analysis:
You understood the analysis, good!
Dissections:
I would really like to point out that the texture done by you is very vague, i can see scratchy and lines marks, very rough and vague. I know the dissections is a tedious work so I am not much pressing on this (specified in this: https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/7/step4). You understood the topic so its okay. But, do remember for your future lessons to be more detailed as it gives a cherry on the top thingy to your construction.
Construction:
I liked your work in this section, nice!
Form Intersections:
Your Intersections are really nice, but you didn't used line weight to specify or highlight intersection. So, it's creating a bit of confusion. This is the challenging topic but you tackled it well. Very good! i loved it, keep it up!
Organic Intersections:
No changes required at all, nicely done. Perfect slouching and shadows very well!
**One more thing: I especially highlighted your mistakes for you to understand and not to repeat those. As we are here to learn, we should know where we are going wrong. Don't feel sad or worry about it too much you will succeed eventually with time and effort thats all. You will do well ALL THE BEST!
Do get back to me with your revision work.**
If you have any query about the review, feel free to ask!
Thank You!
Next Steps:
1 page of organic arrows (with reading and understanding of the topic).
1 page of organic forms with contour lines (with changes specified and intentional curves)
Hi!
First of all, thank you for the critique! It's very helpful to get someone else's view on your work, so that you can spot your errors and improve your weaknesses.
Your critique was descriptive and structured, which I appreciated. I tried following your comments while redoing the exercises, please tell me if they still need some work!
Revision exercises: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1eVAaRwKFU8d6tW9lxq_Ym9yGRLn9ajHw/view?usp=sharing
Note: For the contour lines, I did the full-ellipses and half-ellipses on the same page.
Hello!
Thank You for replying back!
Your work is much improved now!
Well Done, keep it up!
I am marking your lesson as complete! :)
Next Steps:
yayy!! you can move onto next lesson.
These are what I use when doing these exercises. They usually run somewhere in the middle of the price/quality range, and are often sold in sets of different line weights - remember that for the Drawabox lessons, we only really use the 0.5s, so try and find sets that sell only one size.
Alternatively, if at all possible, going to an art supply store and buying the pens in person is often better because they'll generally sell them individually and allow you to test them out before you buy (to weed out any duds).
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