1 users agree
3:28 PM, Wednesday May 11th 2022

Starting with your arrows, you've done well in terms of depth and solidity. The fluidity is also quite nice, however if you'd work on making your strokes more confident, I think that would push forward the fluidity of your arrows. Moving on to the leaves, I think they'd improve if you'd use the same fluidity you use in your arrows here and then again, confidently. Make sure you don't try to fix a line once it's made. Ghost a stroke, and once you execute it, no matter how it is, leave it be. When you draw your flow line in a leaf, make sure you add the arrowhead, so you're reminded of the direction it flows. When you add your edge detail, make sure it's done slowly, and only once you end one unit start the other. Also keep in mind where the edge detail will appear with regards to how the leaf turns. You've done this quite well in the leaf above the leaf in the left bottom corner. However it sacrificed the solidity of the other two twisted leaves when you disregarded the positioning of the edge detail. Otherwise, it's quite good. Moving on to your branches, you've variated the degree of the ellipses with regard to their placement, but you'd do much better if you'd just push the variation further. Make the thin ellipses thinner and the wide ellipses wider. A general rule of thumb is to make the ellipses that are far wider. I like that you've added arrowheads to your branches, as this reinforces solidity. I'd like to include a little reminder to draw from your shoulder, this might be limiting your range of line confidence. Now, in your plant constructions, you've made the width of the small ellipses thinner and big ellipses wider, keep in mind that the degree of the ellipses depends on the position of the ellipses, not the width of the form. When you followed the demos, you've added contour ellipses instead of full ellipses and while this is not wrong, at this stage it would be better for your understanding of the forms to add full ellipses while dissecting a form. Make sure you're applying the concepts from the leaf and branch exercises when you construct plants, try to imbue that same fluidity. When you're adding textural detail, don't outline the forms, just fill in the shadow shapes the same way you did in the texture exercises. It would be good if you'd try to construct a plant without any detail or texture, that would help you construct your forms with more of an awareness for spatial reasoning and not as flat shapes upon which you add texture. As a whole you've done quite well this lesson, I'd like to request revisions for just one plant construction without detail.

Next Steps:

A plant construction without detail

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
3:22 PM, Thursday May 12th 2022

https://imgur.com/a/Pew3jO8

Thanks for your critique. Here is my revision for the lesson.

3:47 AM, Saturday May 14th 2022

It's looking good, I'll go ahead and mark the lesson as complete.

Next Steps:

Move on to lesson 4

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
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Like the Staedtlers, these also come in a set of multiple weights - the ones we use are F. One useful thing in these sets however (if you can't find the pens individually) is that some of the sets come with a brush pen (the B size). These can be helpful in filling out big black areas.

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