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3:27 AM, Sunday January 15th 2023

Hi, I'll be giving you my feedback for this lesson. But first thing first, congratulation on finishing this lesson!

Organic Arrows

The arrows you drew were impressive, it shows how confident you are with your pen. The use of perspective was good too, with gradual progression of width to know whether the arrow is close to me or not. One thing to note about the shadings is that I think you got some of the shadings on the wrong side of the curve. I believe the shadings should go in the inner curve not on the outer curve to show that the inner curve was blocked by the outer one. I saw you did some of the shadings correctly on the second page of organic arrows. Most of the shadings mistakes could be seen in the first organic arrow image. Check with the example that was given to see what I mean about the shading.

Organic form with Contour

The sausage and the ellipses looked confident. Some of the contour ellipses still suffer from inaccuracy, causing them to not hit the outline of the sausage or sometimes went beyond it. The contour curves looked a bit crooked but it's still confident nonetheless. There is a slight variation of degrees that I appreciate, though a bit more variation would be nice to highlight the fact that it is a 3d object.

Texture Analysis

I can't seem to find your texture analysis, so I'm just gonna ask you to submit it in the revision.

Dissections

The dissections you did were impressive, using techniques from texture analysis as well. Having the edge dense while the centre sparse was a good trick. I like that the texture popped off from the sausage and I learned a lot of things just from your result. I think the weakest one would be the wood on the second page (left bottom corner) where the shadings on the denser area seem a bit too much. Anyway, I liked it!

Form Intersections

For form intersection, I think your intersection should go a little bit deeper to get the full experience of the homework. You need to add line weight to the part where the shapes intersect, that way the viewers know which one is on top of which. For example, a tube going into a box would produce a circular line on the box. The boxes intersection had the boxes on top of one another, but you didn't exactly online how they intersects. Also, you submitted 2 of the same page for form intersections. I would like you to revise the 1 page of box intersections and one page of form intersections to help you get the full experience of this exercise.

Organic Intersections

While the sausage is aligned correctly on top of one another, the cast shadow provided was a bit too wavy. One end would be bigger than the other end. Furthermore, some of the cast shadows on the second page didn't really wrap up with the shape underneath and instead just floats, making it less believable as a 3d object. Try to keep in mind the direction of the lights so you could draw the shadow better.

Next Steps:

1 Page of dissections

1 page of box form intersections and one page of form intersections (A new one). Keep in mind to put more line weight on the intersection and please highlight how they intersect one another. Think about which shape go into the other shape.

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
12:43 PM, Wednesday August 23rd 2023

thanks a lot for the feedback and detailed advice I've redone my revision although its take a lot of time

here's the revision link

https://imgur.com/gallery/bBhXeas

1:00 PM, Saturday November 11th 2023

Hi,

Sorry for the late reply, but yes that was an improvement. Good job! I'll mark this as done!

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete, and 2 others agree. The student has earned their completion badge for this lesson and should feel confident in moving onto the next lesson.
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