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8:38 AM, Saturday August 19th 2023
Hello there I am quat and I am going to critique your submission
First of all organic arrows exercise: although your lines are fairly confident and you seem to handle perspective really well but you should have drawn through your forms and I might need you to redo this part but try to follow the steps carefully next time.
Secondly organic forms with counter lines: to start with, some of your shapes both in counter Ellipses and the counter curves are complex, meaning that they have a side noticeably bigger than the other, for the counter ellipses the degree on a lot of the ellipses don't change and that is a mistake as shown here and for the counter curves, some of the curves are shallow but I am debating on whether you should redo them or not.
Thirdly texture: for the texture analysis I don't know what are the materials that you drew are exactly but the lesson specify that you should draw crumbled paper as your first texture, as for the dissections exercise you also didn't specify the textures but I see that you followed the curvature of the forms and you also broke the silhouette which is a good thing, I should point out that your detailing is explicit rather than implicit which makes it overwhelming to look at and very distracting.
Fourthly the form intersection exercise: every page of this exercise have the problem of having small groups they should be just one big group, aside from that this exercise was done well.
Lastly the organic intersection exercise: the shadows are sticking to the form a lot of the time, check here and some of the forms don't have shadows where they should, I recommend that you think of the light source and it's brightness when doing the exercise for the next time.
I hope that I wasn't very harsh on you in my critique and I hope that you keep checking back on the critique when you redo the lesson
Next Steps:
You should redo the entire lesson 2, try to take your time and ask the people in the discord if you are having trouble with anything
8:33 PM, Friday September 8th 2023
Hello, thank you very much for your advice, it has helped me a lot. Here I send you new exercises.
2:13 PM, Sunday September 10th 2023
Hi there:)
I see that you did an amazing job with the organic arrows and the organic forms exercises.
also I see that I for some reason didn't give you tips on how to improve the texture analysis exercise, I don't have much to say about the crumbled paper, and Leaves are objects with texture inside them, and while it is possible for them to be used as texture in of them selves but these kinds of textures are kind of more appropriate for the dissections exercise where you can see the leaves wrap around the form, rather than feeling like stickers glued onto a flat surface if this makes sense, for the rocks texture, your texture feels scribbled and rushed, and while you don't seem to draw too much information but you seem to draw too little information, where it can be hard to tell what the viewer is looking at without directly informing them of what the texture is supposed to be, also the transition from dark to light is not gradual, you can start drawing from the middle of the raw or even start from the light section of the raw and move towards the dark end, this way you can control the density of the texture more flexibility, I am going to ask you to do this exercise again and I hope that you take your time and if you want to, you can change the textures that you draw for this exercise .
For the dissections exercise, some of the textures are still a bit noisy but you seem to follow the shadows well.
For the forms intersection exercise, you didn't have the forms intersection exercise in your revision, so I will need to ask you for at least too pages for the next revision (one being only boxes and the other including other shapes.
For the organic intersection exercise, some of the shapes are stacked on each others in a way that makes them feel flat, and also you have drawn the forms a bit small which isn't a mistake but you could have drawn them bigger, other than that I can say that your shadows have improved.
Next Steps:
You should submit one page of the texture analysis exercise with two pages of the form intersection exercise (one with only boxes in it and other with other shapes included)
9:49 PM, Monday October 9th 2023
Good afternoon, I send what I made.
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