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7:29 PM, Thursday April 22nd 2021

Starting with your arrows, these are drawn with a good deal of confidence, and flow quite nicely through space. You do seem to hesitate a little more when adding your line weight, however - remember that as with all markmaking, the fluidity of your stroke is more important than its accuracy. You'll need to be executing these line weight marks with the same kind of confidence, using the ghosting method, in order to keep them smooth. Your accuracy may suffer a bit at first, but it's better to have a smooth mark that's a bit off, than to trace hesitantly, focusing on how the line you're drawing moves across the flat page, rather than how it represents an edge moving through 3D space.

Moving onto your leaves, here I do think that in comparison to your arrows, there is more rigidity and stiffness here. You are capturing how the leaves move through space to a point, but it's a step down from the motion you were able to capture with the arrows. Remember that the challenge at hand is the same. When drawing the flow line of your leaves, you're effectively just capturing how it moves through the world. The second step takes that sense of fluidity and maintains it while expanding the leaf into an actual shape, rather than just a line, that moves through 3D space. And finally, when you build up your edge detail, you are simply building upon that existing structure, adding a bit of variation to the edges.

So when you draw the initial flow line, remember that it's all about capturing a sense of movement. One thing that can help with this is to draw the flow line with a little arrow head at its tip. It seems silly, but it genuinely can help connect this exercise to the arrows exercise before it.

When adding edge detail, one significant issue in your approach is that you appear to be using it as an opportunity to actually redraw a given leaf in its entirety. This is fundamentally incorrect. As shown here, you should only be adding the individual bumps or cuts, having them rise off the edge from the previous phase of construction, and return to it. Do not redraw the parts that don't change, and don't zigzag edge detail back and forth across the simpler edge.

Lastly, for this particularly twisty leaf, draw it as though you have x-ray vision, allowing the edges to continue unbroken from one end of the leaf to the other. This will help you better understand how the things you're drawing actually move through 3D space, rather than just as a series of lines and shapes on a flat page.

For your branches, it appears that while you're not too far off, you aren't actually following the instructions to the letter. As explained here, you should be extending each segment fully halfway to the next ellipse, allowing for much more of an overlap between the lines so they can transition more smoothly and seamlessly from one to the next.

Also, when drawing your ellipses for this exercise, consider how the degree ought to shift as we slide towards or away from the viewer. This is explained in greater detail in the newer version of the lesson 1 ellipses video.

Getting into your plant constructions, there's a lot of cases where you're following the principles of building up from simple to complex fairly well, although there are a number of cases - specifically with leaves - where you jump into far greater levels of complexity that simply aren't supported by the structure you've already got built up thus far. For example, for these leaves you've not only skipped the flow line altogether, but the leaf shapes themselves are vastly too complex to feel solid and three dimensional on their own. As you can see here on another student's work, complexity is something you work up to one step at a time.

The overall approach shown here is better, in that you're building things up step by step, although really focus on pushing the sense of fluidity and motion of that original flow line, as discussed previously. Also, avoid this approach of laying down a very faint underdrawing, then going back over those lines in order to commit to them. Every single mark you put down should itself be confident, and committed, from the beginning. This means applying the ghosting method to make sure you've thought through how that mark is meant to contribute to your drawing, then executing it without hesitation, and without trying to keep it hidden.

Sometimes students get confused about the purpose of line weight, and consider that perhaps line weight is an opportunity to commit more firmly to a line that may have been more tentative initially. This is not the case. Line weight serves a particular purpose, to clarify specific line weights in limited, localized areas. It's always drawn confidently, and should not be traced back over long lengths of existing linework.

When it comes down to any non-constructional marks (like the little textural marks you were drawing coming off the spine of the leaves), just remember the principles from Lesson 2. Purposely draw them in two steps, first outlining your intended cast shadow shape, then filling them in. This will help you avoid the temptation of just painting them on as individual strokes.

One last point - make sure that you draw through your constructions in full. So for example, with the hooker lips plant, you cut off the leaves where they're overlapped by another structure. As I mentioned before, drawing each form in its entirety helps us to better understand how they sit in 3D space, and how they relate to one another within that 3D space, ultimately moving us beyond the more limited view of our drawings as a collection of lines on a flat page.

All in all, you're moving in the right direction but there are a number of areas where you're straying from key principles of construction, and of the techniques/steps laid out in the lesson. I'm going to assign a few additional pages below so you can get back on track.

Next Steps:

Please submit the following:

  • 1 page, half of leaves and half of branches

  • 3 pages of plant constructions

As a side note, you're welcome to draw in various colours, but stay away from the brighter ones, and don't draw with more than one colour on a single drawing.

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
2:47 PM, Sunday May 2nd 2021

Hi,

I tried to control the ellipses especially the degree but that shoulder control just isn't there yet. So I just focused on the flow. Hope it came across.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1fPzGez0RsCfm-QZx4aaApbZzygXiN11G?usp=sharing

4:09 PM, Monday May 3rd 2021

As a whole, this is looking much better, and it has been applied quite effectively to your plant constructions. I noticed just one issue - periodically you'll slip back into old habits in regards to the branches technique. For example, as shown here, you're only allowing for a minimal overlap between the segments. As shown in the instructions, you are supposed to be starting a given segment back at the previous ellipse.

Anyway, all in all, this is considerable progress. I'll go ahead and mark this lesson as complete.

Next Steps:

Move onto lesson 4.

This critique marks this lesson as complete.
5:38 PM, Thursday May 6th 2021

Thanks a lot. Appreciate the time.

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