danielcalencar

Yes. Even if you were working on this course consistently, you should re-read and re-watch the material. No one has perfect memory and there is probably something you missed. I've had times either through re-watching/reading the material or getting a critique that I realized I missed a piece of information that flew over my head.

Others have gotten into the point that the 50% rule is not about doing what is fun right now, but rather facing that frustration head-on so as to remove its power and to develop the capacity to enjoy drawing further down the road, so I won't further beat that horse.

I will mention however that what I show in that video is not me as a beginner. The sketchbook I flip through there is something I drew in 2012. I started drawing as a hobby a good ten years and more before that. Rather, this section from the Lesson 0 page that discusses the 50% rule shows examples from when I was a beginner.

The thing is, looking out at the world with depression is like looking through a messy, dusty window that hasn't been cleaned in ages. What you see isn't an accurate reflection of what's actually there - rather, it's twisted by the depression you're forced to look through. And so, when you see drawings done by other people, you tell yourself what their story is. You tell yourself that it didn't take that much effort, that they're basically beginners, that you should be able to achieve what they do right this second, and if you can't, that you're somehow a failure.

But none of that reflects reality - and so, the realizations you think you're forming right now are also not rooted in the world around you. They're rooted in the glass through which you're looking at the world, and all of the stains and grime that covers it. And, as noted in this section from the 50% rule material, I hope you are seeking help for that specifically.