TotalTempest

High Roller

The Indomitable (Spring 2024)

Joined 4 years ago

7175 Reputation

totaltempest's Sketchbook

  • The Indomitable (Spring 2024)
  • The Indomitable (Winter 2023)
  • The Indomitable (Spring 2023)
  • The Indomitable (Winter 2022)
  • Sharing the Knowledge
  • The Observant
  • High Roller
  • Technician
  • Geometric Guerilla
  • Tamer of Beasts
  • The Fearless
  • Giver of Life
  • Dimensional Dominator
  • The Relentless
  • Basics Brawler
    0 users agree
    6:10 PM, Sunday March 3rd 2024

    It looks like you submitted this assignment as a "partial," enough though it appears that you drew all 250 boxes. Please resubmit this assignment not as a partial.

    2:15 PM, Sunday March 3rd 2024

    Sorry for the late reply.

    These arrows are looking good now! Other than 1 spot on one of the arrows in the top left, all lines seem to be overlapping correctly.

    I think you are ready to move on to Lesson 3 now.

    Next Steps:

    Lesson 3

    This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
    12:56 AM, Wednesday January 10th 2024

    I see improvements made to both your Organic Forms and Organic Intersections, great job! Your Organic Arrows still aren't overlapping correctly. I have tried to do a draw-over of your assignment here.

    There were some points where it seemed that the same line was conveying 2 different sides of the arrow at the same time, creating confusion on the form of the arrow. I have attempted to draw new lines in red and scribble out lines in blue to show how these lines should have overlapped. Review the assignment and notice how the 2 sides relate to each other. Notice how it is essentially the same line but directly underneath it.

    When I did this assignment, I tried to imagine the two lines as two rails of a very bendy railroad track. Each rail needed to line up with each other in space, or the train will get derailed (oh nose!)

    I am going to ask for more revisions on the Organic Arrows exercise, as it will play a big role in Lesson 3.

    Next Steps:

    1 More Page of Organic Arrows

    When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
    1 users agree
    8:38 PM, Saturday December 16th 2023

    You did an excellent job with this assignment! I don't really have any corrections to make, so I will point out what you are doing right.

    • Your superimposed lines, ghosted lines, and ghosted planes both look straight and confident.

    • Your tables of ellipses and ellipses in planes are looking confident and smooth.

    • Your ellipses in funnels are well aligned and well spaced.

    • Your plotted perspective and rough perspective are demonstrating an understanding of vanishing points.

    • Your rotated boxes seem to be very well crafted, and demonstrate a solid understanding of perspective, though it does seem that one side is rotated a bit more than other.

    • The organic perspective demonstrates a clear understanding of foreshortening, though I am seeing a bit of wobbliness in the line work.

    The last 2 assignments are supposed to be a struggle, so I am not too concerned with them, especially the organic perspective, as you will be working on this next in the 250 Box Challenge.

    Next Steps:

    250 Box Challenge

    This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
    0 users agree
    8:18 PM, Saturday December 16th 2023

    It seems that you did a very good job with these boxes! I only have 2 corrections to make. The first one is major, the second is minor.

    1. I am noticing a lot of parallel lines on your boxes. This shouldn't be the case when lines converge to a vanishing point.

    2. There were a few boxes where the inner corner wasn't placed correctly. This is a very common problem with students, and it seems that you are doing a fairly good job with it overall, but I would still watch out for it. It may help to draw the box in this order instead.

    Even though your cubes are looking great, I would still like you to draw a few more, mostly to address the parallel lines that were present, as this is a fundamental part of the lesson.

    Next Steps:

    30 More Boxes

    When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
    0 users agree
    7:52 PM, Saturday December 16th 2023

    Good job completing this assignment! Below are my corrections for your assignments.

    • On your Organic Arrows, I don't see perspective being applied correctly. The arrow should be gradually getting smaller as it goes from one side to the other. Don't be afraid to overlap your arrows either.

    • On your Organic Forms with Contour Lines, I am noticing some variety with the angles of the ellipses. I think you are getting the idea, but you should still be mindful of their variety. For the ones with only the visible sides showing, They don't seem to line up with the outside contours. Try to make them more snugly.

    • Your textures are looking nice, although you didn't write down your observations (in words). I can also see white spots on your textures, but this can easily be fixed by using a thicker pen.

    • Your dissections were done very nicely. Your textures break the silhouette and mind the curvature.

    • Your Form Intersections are looking mostly good. I feel that you may have placed some of the intersection lines arbitrarily. This is very tricky and something you will be working on more in the later lessons.

    • Your Organic Intersections seem a bit messy and hard for me to read. It appears that some of the sausages phase-through each other and occupy the same space. In addition, it appears that shadows were placed at random. I would suggest reviewing this lesson and pay attention to how the shadows work. They should be used to separate the forms from each other, so placing them on the bottom of the main form isn't necessary.

    I am going to assign you a few revisions before you can move on. In addition, I noticed that you skipped over the 250 Box Challenge, so I would recommend that you go back and complete that as well.

    Next Steps:

    1 Page of Organic Arrows

    1 Page of Organic Forms with Contour Lines (with Contour Curves)

    2 Pages of Organic Intersections

    When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
    0 users agree
    6:15 PM, Saturday December 16th 2023

    Before I begin your critique, I noticed that you did not submit Lesson 1. I would recommend doing that in order to get feedback on the assignment. Additionally, I noticed that you resubmitted this assignment after saying that someone told you to redo it, but I do not see any pre-existing critiques on this website. Did you do this for all of your other assignments as well? I see that you have completed the assignments all the way up to the 25-Wheel Challenge, yet cannot tell what feedback you are getting. I will still critique your work on the website, and would encourage you to get your other assignments critique on this platform as well.

    250 BOX CHALLENGE

    • It seems about half of these boxes have only one set of lines instead of three. All 3 Dimensions should be getting checked on this assignment. Not having all 3 sets makes it difficult to see errors and give corrections, so I will be focusing more on the boxes that do have all 3 sets.

    • While not necessary, it is nice when students number their boxes. It helps keep track of how many boxes are made.

    • There were a few boxes with extending lines in the wrong direction. Remember that all lines should be going away from the viewer as shown here.

    • I am noticing some parallel lines on your boxes. Remember that if a set of lines are converging to 1 of the 3 vanishing points, the lines would be converging as well.

    • The lineweight around your boxes are completely uniform. The outside contours of the shape should have a little bit of extra thickness as stated here. Although not directly related to perspective, it does keep things organized and more clear.

    • I seem some variety with shapes, but think that there should be more. Here are some examples of different angles that you can render.

    • There seems to be difficulty in trying to place the inner corner. This is a very common issue for students completing this assignment. Try drawing your boxes like this to help with it.

    250 BOX CHALLENGE RESUBMISSION

    • I see that all sets are being represented here and that numbers have been added to the boxes.

    • I still seem some lines being extended in the wrong direction. A good rule of thumb is to plot the lines going towards the obstructed side of the box. If the lines are going towards the face that is completely visible, it is going in the wrong direction.

    • Improvements have been made regarding the parallel lines from your previous attempt, but it is still present on a few of the boxes.

    • Lineweight is still uniform around each of your boxes.

    • I am seeing better variety in the orientation of your boxes.

    • Improvements have been made regarding the inner corners, but some still appear to be off.

    You seem to be going in the right direction in the resubmission, but I still think you need to do some more. Remember to avoid parallel lines, add weight to the outsides of the boxes, extend your lines away from the viewer, and improve the placement of the inner corner.

    Next Steps:

    50 More Boxes

    When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
    0 users agree
    5:07 PM, Saturday December 16th 2023

    I see a "404" error for this assignment submission on Imgur.

    1 users agree
    5:03 PM, Saturday December 16th 2023

    Great job with these assignments! I only have one minor correction to make regarding looseness in your "Funnels" exercise. Below is all of the comments that I have for your assignments.

    • Your superimposed and ghosted lines are looking very good! I'm noticing some strong and straight confident lines here. I am noticing this in your "Ellipses in Planes" exercise as well.

    • Your ellipses are also strong and confident in ellipse exercises. There were a few loosely drawn ellipses in the "Funnels" exercise though. It didn't seem like a major issue though, and the funnels were done well overall.

    • You seem to be understanding perspective on the box exercises pretty well. Nice job!

    • There were a few misaligned planes on the "Rotated Boxes" exercise, and some of the cubes in the "Organic Perspective" exercise had incorrect foreshortening. These are meant to be a struggle, and you seem to have a solid general understanding of these assignments.

    Overall, superb work here. You are definitely ready for the next assignment: The 250 Box Challenge. It's a bit tedious, but I know you will come up on top.

    Next Steps:

    250 Box Challenge

    This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
    11:02 PM, Wednesday March 15th 2023

    Thank you for taking the time to review my assignments!

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