Taevataat

Hi

Thank you very much for your thorough critique.

Here are my 15 additional cylinders: LINK

I must have completely missed the point with the foreshortening. I tried to keep it in mind this time, hopefully they are better now. I tried to apply more convergence when looking more directly at the top of the cylinder and less convergence when looking more at the side of the cylinder.

With the cylinders in the boxes I should have used more foreshortening as well, but I thought that maybe if I didn't go too crazy with it, my boxes and cylinders would look better, because I was quite unhappy with how they were turning out.

It's great getting critique from you. Would be much harder to notice and understand my mistakes if I was working on these exercises on my own.

Thank you very much!

I'm glad I improved. Looking forward to tackling the 250 cylinder challenge. Maybe I'll finally be decent at drawing cylinders, the box challenge sure did help me with drawing boxes.

Hi,

Took me way longer to reply than I wanted. A few personal things came in the way.

Anyways, I finished the 3 additional pages. A goat, a dog and a red panda.

I tried to keep in mind what you said in your critique but I'm not really sure how well I did.

I think my head construction improved and I tried my best not to cut into any ellipses that I drew. As for line weight and additional masses. I tried to keep in mind how the masses would wrap around all the ellipses and other masses that I had drawn previously and I tried not to alter the silhouette with additional line weight. But I think you need to judge it yourself. There's still a lot of room for improvement, I feel.

The link below contains my revised pages:

Revised pages (3/3)

Also, watched the video you did with Proko. It was really cool - very inspiring.

Started reading your comic again as well. I really like it. It's funny and I like the style of it.

And thank you for all the effort you put into your critiques!

Hi

Thank you. This is invaluable.

I'll try to keep all that in mind in lesson 5.

The ant and dog leg construction diagrams are really good. I suppose I completely missed the point with the leg construction. But I now understand how the sausage form is good for laying down the base form of the leg while still keeping the gesture interesting and not too stiff. And don't cut into the silhouette! Need to remember that one as well.

Thanks again.

Hi

Thank you very much for very thorough critique!

And I agree with what you have said.

With my previous organic forms I suppose I just got caught up in the moment and forgot to add the minor axis. As for the forms not being even on both ends - that's just a failure on my part to draw them evenly. This time I tried to make the organic forms more even and included the minor axis.

With my new bug drawings I tried to keep to the instructions you have given and not add any unnecessary details or shading. Only minor details and cast shadows (where I knew how).

I now see how much I cheated with my previous “shading” and “underdrawings”. With the shading it seems like I tried to “fix” my broken forms by hiding or going over the mistakes. And by going over my lines I did end up breaking the illusion of 3D. Plus, with my underdrawings I didn’t really think as much about the underlying structure and form and always approached my lines as “I’ll fix it when I go over it on the second pass”. I now see how that’s a habit and is rather detrimental to the learning process.

Hopefully the new drawings are an improvement. I drew a few more pages as I thought my first pages weren’t very good (though I suppose I could have just not uploaded them).

It was difficult to stop myself from repeating past mistakes but I hope I succeeded this time.

Link to the revised drawings.

Thank you very much for the very detailed critique!

You are right about what you said about lineweight, underdrawings and my overall construction.

I seemed to have forgotten the base principal of Drawabox. The idea that "...every single mark we put down defines a solid, three dimensional form, and that we are always working in 3D space."

I will definitely try to keep that in mind in the next lesson and will try not to draw over my construction lines nor use such heavy lineweight when adding additonal detail to the drawing.

Great point about lineweight as well. I still need a lot of practise with it but you're right in saying that I seemed to be using lineweight as shadows. Which I didn't really think about before but will keep in mind in the future.

Great getting a critique from you.

Thank you

Hi

Thank you very much for your critique.

I think you're spot on with the "need more mileage" remark.

Hopefully I'll improve when I continue with DaB.

Thank

Thank you very much for the feedback!

I'll try to keep what you said in mind when doing the next Draw A Box assignments. Especially getting my lines more confident.

Thank you again.

Thank you Meta for the feedback. I'll keep the things you pointed out in mind when moving on to the 250 box challenge.