SoleilLevant

soleillevant's Sketchbook

10:11 AM, Friday March 17th 2023

It's ok but be carefull with parralel lines :)

Next Steps:

Lesson 2 !

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12:22 PM, Friday March 10th 2023

Congrats to have complete lesson 2 !

Arrows : Well let's start this critique, First idk why but you use a blue firstly but It's ok, your lines are good as a whole however you repeating lines, lines should not be repeated even if they're wrong, as always, if there is a mistake it should be ignored. Secondly you should add more compression to your arrow, the arrows need to get bigger and bigger as they go towards the viewer. Both in size, and the spacing between each fold.

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/011d064f.jpg

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/0f7c806c.jpg

Next Sometimes you add lineweight but be carefull with them, here is some points on lineweight :

-When adding lineweight to the arrows, they should only be done with 1 line, no more so the lineweight is not overdone.

-Lineweight needs to be done with a confident, ghosted line. Tracing over the previous line slowly is a mistake.

-Lineweight should only be added to the part that overlaps as well, it is not needed to add lineweight to the full line.

Organic forms : Your sausages are correct and your ellipses too, however te degrees of your ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static.

https://imgur.com/rXLBxSg

You contours are hooking which is great however you added lineweight / repeating your lines wrongly again.

To conclude often your ellipses are misaligned so watch out !

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/4d7871e1.jpg

Textures : Amazing ! (Tell me the secret :)

Dissections : Exellent !

Form Intersections : This seems correct to me however you added lineweight / repeating your lines wrongly again.

Organic intersection : Pretty good ! However you should add more shadows

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/516f8d4f.jpg

Next Steps:

• 1 page of Arrow

• 2 page of Organic shapes / 1 ellipse / 1 countours lines

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
12:04 PM, Friday March 10th 2023

Well It's ok :)

Next Steps:

Lesson 3 or 25 texture challenge.

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
2 users agree
9:25 AM, Friday March 10th 2023

Congrats to have complete lesson 2 !

Arrows : First your lines are confidently executed which is great however your lineweight are pretty messy, here is somepoints on them :

-When adding lineweight to the arrows, they should only be done with 1 line, no more so the lineweight is not overdone.

-Lineweight needs to be done with a confident, ghosted line. Tracing over the previous line slowly is a mistake.

-Lineweight should only be added to the part that overlaps as well, it is not needed to add lineweight to the full line.

Next, you should accentuate the compressing of your arrows, the arrows need to get bigger and bigger as they go towards the viewer. Both in size, and the spacing between each fold.

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/011d064f.jpg

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/0f7c806c.jpg

Organic forms : Your saussages are pretty, however often the angle of your ellipses are messy, here something that may help you : https://imgur.com/rXLBxSg

Textures : Great but you should accentuate the gradient .

Dissections : Good work !

Form Intersections : It would appear that you understand the exerice however try to not add too much solid, something like 12 is fine.

Organic intersection : Pretty ok but sometimes your shadows are a little bit off : https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/516f8d4f.jpg

Next Steps:

Lesson 3 or 25 textures challenge !

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete, and 2 others agree. The student has earned their completion badge for this lesson and should feel confident in moving onto the next lesson.
0 users agree
8:45 AM, Friday March 10th 2023

Congrats to have complete lesson 2 !

Arrows : First your lines are good as a whole however try to not repeat your lines if you did a mistake, just write it down in your head. Secondly you arrows are not really compressing, the arrows need to get bigger and bigger as they go towards the viewer. Both in size, and the spacing between each fold.

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/011d064f.jpg

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/0f7c806c.jpg

And Last but not at least be carefull with lineweight, here is some important points on lineweight :

-When adding lineweight to the arrows, they should only be done with 1 line, no more so the lineweight is not overdone.

-Lineweight needs to be done with a confident, ghosted line. Tracing over the previous line slowly is a mistake.

-Lineweight should only be added to the part that overlaps as well, it is not needed to add lineweight to the full line.

Organic forms : First your ellipses are not really confident so you should rework that,secondly I notice that your ellipses was struggling with the angle of your ellipse, here is something that may help you : https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/6822fd02.jpg

https://imgur.com/rXLBxSg

Then you are actually hooking the contours of your sausages which is great but try to make them a little bit more with confidence (ghosting method and using your shoulder is the key). To conclud with Organic forms, your ellipses touching the boundaries which is good however your ellipses are misaligned on the the axis line. https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/4d7871e1.jpg

Textures : Good work !

Dissections : Nothing to say, again :)

Form Intersections : I'm not going to get ahead of myself on this exercise, but it seems correct to me.

Organic intersection : Well last exercice, So the only thing that I notice is your shadows which are too big , what I mean by that is that it takes up too much space however as a whole It's seem correct, you understand the exercice.

Next Steps:

Hehe Homework time :) (sorry)

• 1 page of arrows

• 2 page of Organic forms ( one with ellipses and one with hooking lines).

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
12:53 PM, Thursday March 9th 2023

It's ok but you did 5 pages It's was only two but anyway.

Next Steps:

Lesson 3 !

Or 25 texture challenge !

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
0 users agree
7:37 AM, Thursday March 9th 2023

Congrats to have complete lesson 2 !

Arrows : First of all , I don't know why but you did 3 pages of arrows instead of 2 but It's ok, you should just avoid to do more than what is required of you. So let's start, I saw that you was putting some notes for you which is a great idea so continue to do this but be carefull with that this must not interfere with the duty. Then your lines are great and you didn't repeating your lines and the compression is correct as a whole, as well as you lineweight too.

Organic forms : Let's continue with Organic forms which in general are great too, good lines, your sausages have great forms. However pay attention with the degree of your ellipses https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/6822fd02.jpg

Apart from that the rest of the mistakes were not made, congratulations.

Textures : Good job !

Dissections : Damn, It's just amazing im fan, Exellent !

Form Intersections : I have the feeling that you understood pretty well the exercice which amaze however some of the lines in your cubes seem to be parallel I can't check but you should pay attention to taht and I noticed in some places that your line weight was messy in certain cases.

Organic intersection : Well let's conclude this great submission with the last exercice. Sadly I have agin no many things to say about your work just exellent, good job !

Next Steps:

I saw that you did the lesson 3 so congrats and continue with lesson 4 and you can also try the 25 textures challenge :)

This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
0 users agree
12:09 PM, Wednesday March 8th 2023

Well I will make this critique soon so don't take it pls.

1 users agree
10:17 AM, Wednesday March 8th 2023

Congrats to have complete lesson 2 !

**Arrows : The first thing that I noticed was that you draw too small, you should draw bigger to promote the use of your shoulder. Secondly It's amazing to see that even though you drew small your lines remain on the whole correct moreover I could notice that you sometimes go over your lines to correct a mistake please don't do that anymore. Then I saw that your arrows was not compressing as a whole, the arrows need to get bigger and bigger as they go towards the viewer. Both in size, and the spacing between each fold.

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/011d064f.jpg

And to conclude with arrows be carefull with lineweight

-When adding lineweight to the arrows, they should only be done with 1 line, no more so the lineweight is not overdone.

-Lineweight needs to be done with a confident, ghosted line. Tracing over the previous line slowly is a mistake.

-Lineweight should only be added to the part that overlaps as well, it is not needed to add lineweight to the full line.**

**Organic forms : Here I noticed the same thing that for the arrows, you draw too small. Then the degrees of your ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static.

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/6822fd02.jpg

https://imgur.com/rXLBxSg

After that pay attention with your contours lines which are not hooking in addition to that many of your ellipses are not correctly alligned to the minor axis line.

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/77f2ca1c.jpg

https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/4d7871e1.jpg

**Textures : For this exercice you did it pretty greatly, so good job but I noticed 2 things first you should be careffuly with the lines that your made for the second texture.

https://i.imgur.com/M9JJfr4.png

And Secondly you should accentuate a little bit the gradient between dark and white.

Dissections : Exellent but draw bigger pls :c

Form Intersections : First pay attention It's seem that many of your box has parralel lines, then you using a clean-up pass, I noticed that you went over your intersection several times, which resulted in something crude, especially visible on the second page. Apart from that, I won't venture too far into this exercise, which is quite complicated.

**Organic intersection : Well it's the last exercice, let's begin, first of all you should draw less sausages and again draw bigger :'c, secondly you should avoid complex form and long sausages like you can see here https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/4213ce18.jpg

And lastly idk if It's really usefull to mention that but you did the same mistake that for the organics form exercice : "After that pay attention with your contours lines which are not hooking ".

**

Next Steps:

Well, sorry to give you homework :)

• 1 page of Arrows

• 1 page of Organic forms

Take your time and try to not reproduce the mistakes I have mentioned.

Good luck ;)

When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
7:33 PM, Tuesday March 7th 2023
``Thanks you so much for this feedback which is really appreciate knowing that it has been more than a month since I published my lesson 2.``

Im actually at 70% of the lesson 3 and I did 7/25 textures of the challenge :)

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