Kunito

:DDD

Looking back at my originals, most of them were so incorrect lmao.

Tysm for critiquing again, and all the best to you too!

Thanks for critiquing me again. Seriously, tysm.

There's a lot of overlapping muscles on the okapi so it looks a little confusing. I think I got pretty much all the overlapping correct though.

Well, improvement. The linework on the first one is still a bit messy (definitely visibly better than before though). I'm pretty proud on how it came out on the second, albeit there still a couple places (like the belly) where I messed up adding weight.

Here's my work

https://imgur.com/a/1z7FzaJ

The fact that it's the coldest here its been in over a decade certainly didn't help with the hands lol.

I am looking forward to yar reply. Pretty excited for the Cylinders challenge.

Overall, excellent job on pretty much all of it.

Arrows and Organic Forms

Great work with the arrows. The line weight is handled especially well.

1. For the organic forms with ellipses and contour lines exercise, you often tend to make the degree of the first ellipse/contour too small which sometimes flattens out your sausages. This degree will always be very close to the contour ellipse at the tip of the sausage. (Either this or you make the degree of the tip counter ellipse to large) Getting this wrong makes the perspective somewhat confusing. Other than that, its pretty good. Especially the smoothness of the lines.

2. Also, try not to go over the contour curves twice. It might end up killing the dimensionality of the sausage instead if you botch the second go. Besides, the second go serves no real purpose here.

Textures

These are simply amazing! This must've taken hella long! Turtle shell and Large Chunky Scales are definitely my favorites.

Intersections

1.Inorganic intersections - I sucked at these so I can't really say much about the intersections themselves. But really good job on making them belong in the same space. Your lines are incredibly clean. They genuinely look like they're drawn with a ruler.

2. Organic intersections - Phenomenal work.

Pretty much the only thing you should pay more attention to is the contour line/ellipse thing.

Excellent work and good luck with the next lessons! You're gonna smash it!

Thank you for the critique!

Making smooth lines is honestly stressful, it's gonna be one hell of an accomplishment to improve them lol. I'll start paying very conscious attention to my confidence/smoothness from now on.

Whoops I'm dumb lol. Extremely sorry about the reference miss.

Anyways, personally, I'd prefer working additively, as it makes feathers well seem that they're in a single (bent) plane to me.

I can't really work well without drawing this out, so I'd determine the location of the flow line to be jus before the silhouette break in the back, and continue the flow to the front without being to worried about exactly matching the reference.

Again, this is just what I would do.

I would definetely reccomend you to draw the fluffy part at the start of the wings though (which is visible in your reference too). Not necessarily make it fluffy, but attach the feathers to something. The starts of the feathers just floating around really doesn't look right to me.

And damn, this is on hell of a difficult problem lol. Amazing question. I guess just try drawing the wing individually with a bunch of methods, and see which feels best.

I hope someone can give a good method to do this. I'll be checking this post repeatedly for a while lol.

I'm only at Lesson 4 now so take this with a sizeable grain of salt. But hopefully given I've drawn a bunch before DAB, this can still help. Take your own inferences, this is just my opinion/process.

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The major problem looks like the shape and flow of the feathers. But again, I don't have your reference.

As you haven't provided a reference, I'll work with the "sparrow taking flight" references I found on google image search. All of them have rectangular-triangular feather.

eg.https://farm5.staticflickr.com/4055/4311284187_547d0a1056_z.jpg

eg.http://blog.martinbelan.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/House_Sparrow_20141109_0001.jpg

eg.https://expertphotography.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/05/birds_in_flight_photography_sparrow.jpg

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From the underside, the connection between the front limb and the body is very distinct. There's some fluff on the underside of the limb, and the end of the limb merges into a feather.

The feathers are distinct only at the farther end are distinct/serperate, as you've drawn.

But, at the lower ends, the overlapping is quite 'sharp' and distinct.

Your feathers, on the other hand, are overlapped very haphazardly.

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My construction: https://imgur.com/a/SK07U6q

My process: (Mainly used the first linked image as reference)

1. Connected the front limb to the body. Should have drawn through, sorry for that.

2. Defined the outer bound of the wings with a simple line.

3. Defined the bound of the fluff with a simple line.

4. Started drawing the feathers one by one. The upper feathers overlap the lower ones in this reference. Add some lineweight if drawing through. Note the shape of the feathers. Also note the feathers start form over the fluff. From above, there's a layer of short feathers instead of the fluff which originate from the limb connection to the body.

5. Made sure to break the silhouette with the feathers, and avoided drawing subtractively.

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Again, I'm not very good at this either, so don't take my word absolutely for anything here. And I am short on time so I didn't put too much time into my construction (sorry about that) .But I do hope I managed to help in some way.

Good luck!

Extend through the plotted points.

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There seems to be a bunch of conflicting opinions here, so I'll reason mine briefly.

The point of the exercise is to be able to estimate convergence without actually drawing the lines all the way. And to correct yourself if you're estimating the lines at too far (i.e. going beyond vp) or narrow of an angle (i.e. falling short of vp)

Whether you are able to nail the lines exactly the way you want to (i.e. through the points you plot) is an entirely different problem - and there's a different exercise for that. Extending the lines you didn't even intend to be the way they are, seems quite pointless to me.

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tldr; the point is to be able to estimate convergence better, whether you can draw it with accuracy is a different matter entirely.

Alright.

The only thing I can offer critique on is the arrows. Your farther ends sometimes tend to be too small, and suddenly get large at the very front. The compression should be more consistent.

Also, on the last exercise (organic intersections), sometimes you make the cast shadows too long vertically.

Other than that, you're kinda nutty bro. I would be genuinely surprised if you aren't a professional artist / art student / have(n't) been practicing for a super long time.

Your textures especially are absolutely insanely ridiculously good.

All the best with your art journey lol. You're absolutely going to smash/are smashing it.

Firstly, Congratulations on completing the lesson!

Your biggest strength is definitely your linework. It's very clean and confident.

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Excellent work with making the arrows go far back into space.

But cap off the arrows at the back lol. Never leave an open end. It quickly destroys solidity.

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The degree of your ellipses changes nicely in the organic forms with contour lines/ellipses exercise. You seem to have a pretty good understanding of how they flow through space.

You could try to ghost the ellipses a bit more.

Regarding a (very) few of your ellipses, it seems you're trying to correct their positions in your second pass - i.e. you're (sometimes) tracking your ellipse as you draw it. Avoid doing so. A tip that helped me especially was trying to execute the second pass exactly the same as the first. Try work your arm muscles in the exact same manner as in the first pass.

This will also help with the occasional wobbliness you have.

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("I did a horrible job on textures but at least I tried doing it for once."

Honestly I also found the textures exercise extremely tedious and had to force myself to slough through it lol)

The texture analysis exercise, well, you're in the same position I was. You're direct studies are really good, but you're way too timid with your shadows when trying to make the texture gradient. Make them a lot bolder and deeper. Remind yourself, the entire left part is in darkness, and the right part is where light is blasting out. Imagining a torch held at the right side helped me personally.

Especially for the tree bark, the part thats at the left should be in the middle.

You should check the critique I got on my post regarding texture analysis if you wanna. It was really well worded. I won't tell you to redo the texture analysis exercise, but do take a look at the aforementioned.

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Your dissections exercise is really well done. Again, the shadows at the ends should be bolder, but otherwise, and especially the animal skin/scales ones are amazing.

A general tip after looking at the sponge one, but the shadows for anything with distinct holes are almost always crescent shaped if the light is coming at an angle (as in our case for the sausages).

For the bricks, again, something I myself drew similar to yours, make them much more curved when wrapping around a sausage/any round form. Compare it to Uncomfortable's demo example on the exercise page.

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For the inorganic intersections, I have no right to speak on the intersections themselves, but good job on the rest. Again, your clean linework really shines here - they all look very solid and in the same space. Your spheres are also very good.

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The flattened sausages in organic intersections are very well done.

One thing is that, for something slagging on the ground, the shadow should be visible on the side that faces the viewer. For example, the shadow being on both sides of the bottom left flat sausage on the second page rather kills it solidity, because it's impossible without multiple light sources. The part of the shadow to the left of that sausage wouldn't be visible as long as there's a single light source. Sorry if the wording is confusing.

Basically, the shadow on the bottom middle big sausage on the first page is fine, but the one on the bottom left flattened sausage on the second page kills the solidity.

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Overall I'd say you did really well. I pointed out the small errors here and there that I saw. As you said, the texture analysis exercise is pretty much the only one you should pay more attention to. I'd recommend you look at a few other people's work on this exercise (hopefully it helps you as much as it did me). Try doing a texture analysis or two if you're feeling motivated enough. This is still optional though as long as you know what you should be doing (there will be opportunities to apply texture in the future lessons)

(This is not very good but illustrates the point about timid shadows:

My original texture analysis: https://i.imgur.com/AyrTRTV.jpeg

My texture analysis after critique: https://i.imgur.com/jlNBdpJ.jpeg )

Sorry if the English was janky at points.

All the best with your art journey!

Thank you! All the best to you too!