Jukesir

The Relentless

Joined 10 months ago

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jukesir's Sketchbook

  • Sharing the Knowledge
  • The Relentless
  • Basics Brawler
    3:32 PM, Tuesday April 23rd 2024

    the form intersections are better now and less confusing, although i do want to point out that your hatching lines should have the same amount of effort put in as all other lines (planned, ghosted and executed with confidence) they look rushed, something to look out for as you move on

    as for the organic contours, i only assigned 1 page of them, and you should only do the amount of work that is assigned because you cant be sure if you're doing them right, they are slightly better, but most of them aren't really hooking around the back (you should overshoot them as if they were to go slightly behind the form if that makes sense) (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/77f2ca1c.jpg) and be sure to align the angle of the curve to the minor axis! (the flow line) (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/4d7871e1.jpg) this is something you can practice in your warm-ups (as you'll be adding all of these exercises to your warm-up selection)

    Next Steps:

    • you can try the contour curves again (with hooking/overshooting and making sure to align them to the minor axis) and send them here if you want and i'll look over them

    • add all of these exercises to your warm-up selection

    • lesson 3

    This community member feels the lesson should be marked as complete. In order for the student to receive their completion badge, this critique will need 2 agreements from other members of the community.
    1 users agree
    6:07 PM, Friday April 19th 2024

    hello, i'll be critiquing your submission

    arrows

    X - some of the lines on the arrow heads look rushed, you should always ghost every line and execute with confidence

    X - there doesn't seem to be any line weight added to the part of the arrow closer to the viewer, making it slightly confusing to figure out which part is behind and which is in front in some arrows

    correct - all of the arrows compress and get smaller as they move farther back

    organic forms

    X - the degree of the ellipses/contours remains mostly the same (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/6822fd02.jpg,

    https://imgur.com/rXLBxSg)

    X - the contour curves are very shallow, they aren't hooking around on most sausages (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/77f2ca1c.jpg)

    X - the contour curves are misaligned to the minor axis (the flow line) (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/4d7871e1.jpg) (although the ellipses seem to be fairly aligned)

    correct - most of the ellipses touch the edges of the sausage

    texture analysis

    correct - drawing in cast shadows and not lines

    correct - gradient is smooth

    correct - no hatching or dotted lines

    dissections

    X - some textures appear really scribbly (especially the hairy one on the second page)

    X - some textures have outlined forms instead of shadow shapes (especially the crocodile one on the first page)

    correct - not afraid to break the silhouette

    form intersections

    • the point of this exercise is to make all of the forms look like they belong in the same scene, it's easier to do if 1.all of the forms have consistent, shallow perspective (some of your forms have dramatic foreshortening) and 2.if they are equilateral (some of your forms are long)

    organic intersections

    X - same as in the contour curves exercise, most curves aren't hooking around (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/77f2ca1c.jpg)

    X - some of the cast shadows are small, they also dont follow the surface that the shadow is cast onto (https://d15v304a6xpq4b.cloudfront.net/lesson_images/516f8d4f.jpg)

    • most stacks look fairly solid, but the 3'rd stack looks slightly unstable, it feels as if the sausages would quickly fall over

    (i saved the critique and cant edit the revisions, i forgot to add, you should also focus on keeping the curves aligned to the minor axis of the organic forms and also make sure to vary the degree of the curve)

    Next Steps:

    • 1 page of organic contour curves (only the curves and not ellipses, those are fine) this time focus on hooking the curve around the form

    • 1 page of form intersections, this time focus on less, but bigger shapes, 10-12 forms should be fine, with shallower, less dramatic foreshortening/perspective and all forms should be close to equilateral

    When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
    4 users agree
    6:02 PM, Wednesday February 14th 2024

    the 50% rule applies to all of drawabox

    so yes, it also applies to the challenges

    hope that answers your question

    5:53 PM, Wednesday February 14th 2024

    i just naturally gravitated to more boxes per page since i really dont like the idea of wasting paper, i was trying hard to be efficient with it, but maybe thats not the best mindset for drawabox since paper is not that expensive

    you're entirely right with the hatching lines, i did all of them almost as an afterthought not really putting much attention to them, i will work on that in the future lessons

    0 users agree
    9:47 PM, Wednesday January 31st 2024

    superimposed lines:

    • there's some fraying on the dot which you started with, this is even clearer on the curvey lines, remember to take some time to place your pen on the starting dot before drawing a line

    rought perspective:

    • for some boxes it looks like you drew multiple times through one line, i know mistakes are annoying but you should try to avoid doing that

    • i see one box in the top left where it looks like one is in front of the other so you didnt draw through the other box, you should always draw through your forms (for drawabox at least), it seems like you did do that for the other exercises later though so its fine, just a concern

    rotated boxes:

    • it looks like you drew the horizon and vertical line with a ruler which is what you're supposed to do, but the 180 degree boxes and the starting boxes' front face look free handed, in the exercise instructions, it says you have to do those with a ruler aswell, you should give yourself more time to carefully read the instructions for each exercise

    • some of the boxes on the very corners seem to be missing, you shouldn't worry about "ruining" the page with those clustered lines, that kinda defeats the purpose of it being an exercise

    organic perspective:

    • lines should be converging towards a vanishing point when moving away from a viewer. i see alot, if not most of the lines diverge when moving away, making it look like you're looking at the inside of a box, you should give yourself more time to think through the planning phase of your line and how the lines should converge towards that point, this is also very important when moving on the 250 box challenge

    i also want to say, please number your pages if there are multiple assigned, or put the date of drawing it on the page, it makes it easier to see if you've improved on the next page or not

    Next Steps:

    • finish the boxes in the very corners of the rotated boxes exercise

    • 1 page of organic perspective with correct line convergence

    When finished, reply to this critique with your revisions.
    5:52 PM, Monday January 29th 2024

    thanks!

    2 users agree
    10:17 AM, Sunday January 28th 2024

    there is a small section in the 50% rule video that addresses the fear of learning things incorrectly

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ocmPR_EprE&t=833s (at 13:53)

    as for learning in the most efficient way, im not sure if there's a solution, there are probably always faster and more efficient ways to approach learning but all learning counts and is definitely better than doing nothing at all to move forward.

    hope this helps, even if just a little bit

    im not very far through DaB yet but i agree with the statement you made near the end so far, 50% rule is important

    8:02 PM, Monday August 21st 2023

    thank you very much, im so ready for the boxes :D

    6:56 PM, Monday August 21st 2023

    the ghosted lines were actually drawn using the same fineliner as for the rest of the lesson but now that i look at it again, i think it got a little blurry when i took the photo and i can see how it could be messed up for a pencil.

    i re-did it with the same fineliner anyway and it should be better now, here you go: https://imgur.com/a/rDmJWKw

    once again thank you for the critique, i was getting ready to wait much longer than i did!

    9:02 PM, Tuesday August 1st 2023

    alright, thats understandable, i didnt know about it applying to other courses though, but i think the 50% rule shouldnt be a problem after im done with drawabox

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