1:57 PM, Sunday May 15th 2022
Thank you for the feedback!
Thank you for the feedback!
Ah okay, they do seem to tackle a bit more complex constructions.
Thank you very much for the detailed explanations and examples! You raised very good points, I'm always impressed how community members catch subtle mistakes I would have missed otherwise. I'll write them in my notes so I don't forget. If I may ask, where did you get those examples? I can't find them in the official lesson.
I feel silly saying thank you after every comment, but you really helped me a lot (especially the diagrams). I'll be returning to this comment when I eventually have trouble in future lessons. The contour lines indicating hard plane changes is my favorite critique! I remember when that was said in the lessons, but I forgot to apply it (also I failed to observe the different planes in the reference).
Wow, in my head I imagined the ant cranium sphere being much larger, but that large sphere would only make everything harder. Thanks for all the answers.
I know the top sausage curves are a bit too same-y. In the top right sausage, I intentionally made the middle contour curve flatter since I wanted to make the sausage go like this: facing us -> facing away from us -> facing us again. Same with the bottom left sausage. Not saying I succeeded, just explaining my thought process. I tried to copy what Uncomfortable did in this vid (7:47), but now that I look at it again this pattern might just have been an inconsistency. I probably overcomplicated it.
I failed the cast shadow of the first insect. Adding contour curves on the tiny bumps on the back might have been a mistake, but without them the shapes looked flat (I hope they aren't considered detail). Thoughts? I also had trouble representing the bottom part of the abdomen in a 3D way, so I just added a contour curve.
Same on the second insect, the (shell?) had no natural contour curves so I added mine to describe the form. The two circles in the front are probably overkill.
Feel free to assign me additional exercises if you think it's necessary. Also, don't hold back on pointing out repeated mistakes.
Thank you very much for the long critique! Before I move onto the revisions, I want to ask a few questions. I understand everything because you explained it so eloquently, this is just to be 100% certain on some things.
A thing I see constantly is that your base forms lack: 1. curves that reinforce the 3D feel
The flat line that goes over the abdomen really demolishes the 3D illusion
This question is unrelated to your critique: Do you know why we're supposed to use only one pen? I think it would help me a lot if I could use both a 0.1 and 0.5 fineliner (.1 for base construction, .5 for refinement and line weight). Some of the smaller areas of insects get really messy for me. I know they're supposed to be messy, but it gets to the point where even I can't tell what's going on anymore.
Here's my critique
You're doing a great job here, the lines are confident and the arrow width increases/decreases consistently. The most obvious problem is the accuracy of the line weight and shading, but that will come with time. The best advice I can give you here is give each line as much time and care as needed.
Another problem is that your arrows are flying horizontally across the page a bit too much when they should be going back in 3D space. There is not enough overlaps, sometimes almost the entirety of the back of the arrow should be covered. Here's an example.
This isn't a critique but rather a suggestion, if you want you can exaggerate the size variations of the arrows. You can make them so large that only a portion of them fits on the paper. I think it's beneficial to do this as it enhances your 3D skills. Example
Your leaves look nice, however you're not always following the scaffolding you laid down. Some of your leaves extend past the construction line which makes that construction line obsolete. Always follow the construction line (even if it ends up looking off) because on more complex objects you'll lose the sense of 3D space as every deviation from it results in flattening your drawing. If you think the construction line is way off, just start the leaf over.
I like how you did the silhouette texture, keep it up! Not quite sure what the two right-most leaves are supposed to look like. If you find yourself using too many lines, you might wanna rethink how you do the construction for that leaf.
You're using way too many ellipses here. This goes for anything in art really, ask yourself "what's the least amount of brush strokes I can do to properly convey my drawing?" The answer usually results in the most pleasing looking image. For example, if you have a slight curve on a branch (like the ones on the top), all you need is three ellipses. Two for the start and end and one in the middle. If you'd have a significantly curved one, you could probably pull it off with four ellipses.
I'll refer to the plants with the convenient number you put on the top of the page! :)
I think you did well here. Your construction feels solid and your plants feel 3D. I'll just list random mistakes as I spot them, they're in no particular order.
(6) I think the cactus texture should vary a bit more. I suggest adding deeper cast shadows as the circle-like forms go further from the light, and maybe even just leaving some of them at the top almost blank, up to the viewers to imagine.
(4) The underside of this plant is kinda confusing. Since we're drawing through the forms it's hard to tell if the bottom side is facing towards or away from us. Of course it's obvious upon further inspection, but I still think you should add some line weight in the front to clarify.
(8) I'm not sure what the plant in the top-right is. I think some silhouette texture could clear it up if the reference had any. I like the way you did the texture on the bottom right one!
(1) Same line weight problem as in (4). We're looking from under the mushroom, right? If so, I suggest adding line weight in these areas. Also, make sure that the ellipses on the branch of the top-left plant turn towards us in a consistent pattern.
You successfully completed the lesson so you can move onto the next. I think you'd benefit from doing some exercises from lesson 1 as warm-ups before future assignments. Choose any exercise you want, but I recommend some ellipse practice, even if it's tedious. It'll improve your accuracy.
Great job, I can see the improvement! You can move onto the next lesson now, I'll give my thoughts on your revisions because why not.
The sausages are nice and consistent now! If you wanna get creative with this exercise in future warmups, you can make the sausage edges both face towards or away from you and make the contour ellipses change directions like this.
I think you did texture the best on the bottom side of the abdomen. Try applying such dark to light transitions whenever you get an opportunity to, whether it's on a big or small scale.
Proceed onto lesson 5! :)
Hi! Here's my critique:
Your accuracy with the contour ellipses is very good, but I'm noticing two problems here. You're not keeping the sausage width consistent, they must not taper like this. Try to make them like you did the two bottom right on the second page. It's fine if you can't draw them in a single stroke. I think segmenting them is allowed, just make sure to continue the line where you lifted the pen with care and precision.
The contour ellipses are all the same angle, meaning they're not rotating in 3D space. Varying their sizes is essential, it's about convincing yourself that you're making something solid. You can find this mistake listed here.
Very good job on the insect construction! Honestly I struggle to find what to critique here, other than some minor accuracy/proportion mistakes (which are not the focus of drawabox). Observing the reference, maybe I'd rather construct the neck of this insect with two sausages so it feels more solid, especially since we're looking at it from side view.
I will critique you on the texture though, as it seems that you're mostly texturing explicitly instead of implicitly, meaning you're outlining a lot of textures and "showing everything" to the viewers. You can see a clear difference between texture scarcity while you followed the demos, vs the insects that you did on your own. There's really not a need to draw every single bump you see on the surface - consider that you're drawing cast shadows, meaning there will be less of them on a lit area but more in the shadows (at some point they begin blending with the form shadow). Also remind yourself that you're not doing this to achieve a pretty drawing, but rather to learn how to observe and apply texture.
Here's an example, you don't need to draw every line on the back of this insect, it's better to imply those lines exists. It's also not necessary to outline the colored patterns that some insects have. In fact, you can completely ignore them, I asked Uncomfortable about this myself.
EDIT: It won't let me edit the section after this, I meant re-read the whole texture section, not just implicit vs explicit segment that I've linked.
I will ask of you to do some revisions because I think they'll help you improve in your weak areas. Firstly, draw one page of organic sausages with contour curves, keeping in mind what I said in my critique.
After that, re-read/re-watch the texture lesson and draw one more textured insect of your choice. Your construction is great so this is just for you to start applying texture the way it's taught on drawabox. While re-reading, compare Uncomfortable's words with your insects and think of how they could be applied. When drawing, constantly ask yourself "How can I represent this texture with as few lines as possible?". Good luck!
Hi! I'll give you a critique.
Your lines are done nicely, confident and consistent! The arrows themselves are fine, but they're mostly going across the 2D surface of a page rather than backwards in 3D space. Try compressing the part of the arrow that goes back in space. Don't be afraid of overlaps, and I don't just mean the ones when the arrow turns but rather a huge chunk of the back side of the arrow covered by the front if needed. Example. Think of how clouds would look going further away from you towards the horizon line. You wouldn't see the entirety of each cloud, would you?
Also, some of the overlap shadows are confusing. Make sure to give each individual stroke the same amount of care and make the shadow lines parallel to the edge of the arrow corner.
Really great job here! The construction feels solid, especially on the top two leaves. The only thing I'd critique here is be careful how you draw the silhouette for the bottom right 2 leaves. I suggest following the construction line with your pen a bit more before each silhouette spike. Also, the silhouette spikes seem to be going in random directions - I don't know which leaf you referenced but from my experience they usually seem to be consistently pointing to the top of the leaf. Recall this section from lesson one.
A lot of your ellipses are flat out circles, meaning the branch is pointing straight towards the viewer in those sections. Be mindful of how the branch exists in 3D space. It's ok to stop drawing and think for a bit before putting the pen down on the paper. I'm also noticing a lack of thin ellipses, it's a waste to not use them when you have them in your arsenal. Sometimes it's correct to even use a line, that is when the branch is pointing exactly perpendicular to the camera.
They look good to me, good job! I recommend posting the reference pictures next time as well so people can have an easier time spotting mistakes.
Here are some minor critiques:
Some of the main branches look very thick. It's fine if it's like that on the reference, but most of the plants I've seen have thinner branches.
I think you could use some line weight since there are areas where it's confusing to determine what's in front of what.
I could be wrong here, but I think we're supposed to have this edge align with the construction ellipse, not the bottom of the leaves in the back as you've put it. Ok I've checked and this is how it's done in the hibiscus demo. I think the reason is, when you're drawing the ellipse, you're copying the visible perspective angle of the petals, not accounting for the ones in the back. But I guess it can be done either way, so do what works best for you.
Ok, that's it. Your accuracy is not perfect in some areas, but that will come with time.
You've understood the core principles of this lesson, so you can go onto the next one. I do think you can improve in the arrows exercise, so please do 3 more pages of them before starting lesson 4. They're easy and fast so it shouldn't be a problem.
There's a guy who critiqued my lesson 2 and I learned a lot from studying his arrows, it's a great reference point for how the exercise should be done. Take a look! I do wanna note that even in his work, the arrows could be compressed more as they go back into space, I think someone critiqued him on this.