1:53 PM, Wednesday June 12th 2024
Thanks for the critique!
Thanks for the critique!
There's a bit of issues like the sausages ends aren't even in some, and the intersections not highlighted properly with line-weight but these are minor. You did as requested and I'm marking your submission complete.
Next Steps:
You can move onto lesson 3!
First glance note : Your pages are bit out of order but I will do my best critiquing your submission
Arrows
Major note : Please do not grind the exercise. You've done 4 pages instead of requested 2.
1. Mistake on lines:
pass although some of the lines feel wobbly.
2.Arrows not compressing:
pass
3.Lineweight related:
a bit of non existent lineweight on the twists
Side note: The hatching seems a bit inconsistent
Organic Forms
1.Mistakes on lines:
some of the hook contours exhibit lack of confidence
2.Not following the simple form they need to be; they should be 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
a few sausages exhibit the issue
3.Degrees of the ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static:
pass
4.Not hooking contours:
pass
5.Misaligned ellipses and not drawing the axis line:
a few are missing the axis line.
6.Ellipses not touching the boundaries, or getting out of them:
pass
Texture Analysis
1.Doing dotting or any kind of hatching to achieve transition:
pass
2.Not doing a seamless transition on the gradients, if either the black bar on the left or the white bar on the right are really easy to spot because the transition isn't smooth enough:
You've missed the point of the transition/gradient. Please revisit the instructions page for this exercise.
3.All marks on this exercise should be done purposefully, and by looking at the reference before, so scribbling or doing non planned marks is a mistake:
pass
Disections
1.Not wrapping the textures around the form:
pass
2.Not breaking the silhouette:
pass
Side note : You're missing some texture work on the ellipses/cross section of the sausages.
Form Intersections
1.Repetition of lines, lines not being confident, not planing lines, not ghosting, clear divergences, not drawing through ellipses, etc.:
Some of your boxes have very clear divergence issues.
2.The forms need to have consistent foreshortening:
pass
Organic intersections
1.Not drawing simple forms. On this exercise the forms should be kept simple, just like in the previous organic forms exercises. 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
2.Shadows sticking to the forms. The shadows have to follow the form of object they're being casted on, not the form of the object that casts it:
pass
3.Not ghosting lines, not hooking the lines, adding linweight by tracing instead of drawing confident lines etc.:
your sausages are missing some lineweight to indicate which sausage is on top of what sausage.
4.Not drawing through forms. You should always draw through forms, just like in the form intersections exercise:
pass
5.Drawing non stable forms:
pass
Please practice on your line work/confidence, you can use lesson 1 exercises as warmup since you've taken a long break.
Next Steps:
Redo a page of Texture analysis but with 2 different textures while keeping the first same as crumpled paper. Please do check thoroughly the instructions page for this exercise -> https://drawabox.com/lesson/2/textureanalysis
Arrows
1. Mistake on lines:
pass
2.Arrows not compressing:
pass
3.Lineweight related:
pass
Organic Forms
1.Mistakes on lines:
pass
2.Not following the simple form they need to be; they should be 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
some sausages have uneven ends
3.Degrees of the ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static:
pass
4.Not hooking contours:
pass
5.Misaligned ellipses and not drawing the axis line:
pass
6.Ellipses not touching the boundaries, or getting out of them:
pass
Texture Analysis
1.Doing dotting or any kind of hatching to achieve transition:
pass
2.Not doing a seamless transition on the gradients, if either the black bar on the left or the white bar on the right are really easy to spot because the transition isn't smooth enough:
pass
3.All marks on this exercise should be done purposefully, and by looking at the reference before, so scribbling or doing non planned marks is a mistake:
pass
Disections
1.Not wrapping the textures around the form:
pass
2.Not breaking the silhouette:
some of the textures aren't breaking the silhouette
Form Intersections
1.Repetition of lines, lines not being confident, not planing lines, not ghosting, clear divergences, not drawing through ellipses, etc.:
2.The forms need to have consistent foreshortening:
pass
Organic intersections
1.Not drawing simple forms. On this exercise the forms should be kept simple, just like in the previous organic forms exercises. 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
2.Shadows sticking to the forms. The shadows have to follow the form of object they're being casted on, not the form of the object that casts it:
pass though there's a bit of confusion on some sausage's cast shadows especially on page 2
3.Not ghosting lines, not hooking the lines, adding linweight by tracing instead of drawing confident lines etc.:
pass
4.Not drawing through forms. You should always draw through forms, just like in the form intersections exercise:
pass
5.Drawing non stable forms:
pass though a nitpick is some of the support is a bit floaty especially the monstrosity that is page 2
Next Steps:
Overall your understanding and follow through of this lesson has gone well. You can head onto lesson 3!
Arrows
1. Mistake on lines:
pass
2.Arrows not compressing:
pass
3.Lineweight related:
pass
Organic Forms
1.Mistakes on lines:
pass
2.Not following the simple form they need to be; they should be 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
3.Degrees of the ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static:
pass
4.Not hooking contours:
pass
5.Misaligned ellipses and not drawing the axis line:
pass
6.Ellipses not touching the boundaries, or getting out of them:
pass
Texture Analysis
1.Doing dotting or any kind of hatching to achieve transition:
pass
2.Not doing a seamless transition on the gradients, if either the black bar on the left or the white bar on the right are really easy to spot because the transition isn't smooth enough:
pass (very well done in this case)
3.All marks on this exercise should be done purposefully, and by looking at the reference before, so scribbling or doing non planned marks is a mistake:
pass
Disections
1.Not wrapping the textures around the form:
pass
2.Not breaking the silhouette:
pass
Side note: Great rendering of the textures!
Form Intersections
1.Repetition of lines, lines not being confident, not planing lines, not ghosting, clear divergences, not drawing through ellipses, etc.:
a few shapes aren't drawn through
2.The forms need to have consistent foreshortening:
pass
Organic intersections
1.Not drawing simple forms. On this exercise the forms should be kept simple, just like in the previous organic forms exercises. 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
2.Shadows sticking to the forms. The shadows have to follow the form of object they're being casted on, not the form of the object that casts it:
pass
3.Not ghosting lines, not hooking the lines, adding linweight by tracing instead of drawing confident lines etc.:
pass
4.Not drawing through forms. You should always draw through forms, just like in the form intersections exercise:
pass
5.Drawing non stable forms:
pass
Next Steps:
Overall you've grasped and followed through the lesson very well, also props to the great rendering of the textures! You can move onto lesson 3.
Arrows
1. Mistake on lines:
pass
2.Arrows not compressing:
On pg2 most of your arrows look too uniform and no barely any convergence
3.Lineweight related:
pass
Organic Forms
1.Mistakes on lines:
pass
2.Not following the simple form they need to be; they should be 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
most of your sausages have uneven ends
3.Degrees of the ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static:
you ellipses are way too static they dont change thier degrees much
4.Not hooking contours:
pass
5.Misaligned ellipses and not drawing the axis line:
pass
6.Ellipses not touching the boundaries, or getting out of them:
pass
Texture Analysis
1.Doing dotting or any kind of hatching to achieve transition:
pass
2.Not doing a seamless transition on the gradients, if either the black bar on the left or the white bar on the right are really easy to spot because the transition isn't smooth enough:
especially evident on the pebbles and mostly the crack study, the pebble shadow transition is too instant, the cracks don't fade into the light towards the right. go through the exercise description page once again.
3.All marks on this exercise should be done purposefully, and by looking at the reference before, so scribbling or doing non planned marks is a mistake:
pass
Disections
1.Not wrapping the textures around the form:
pass
2.Not breaking the silhouette:
pass
Form Intersections
1.Repetition of lines, lines not being confident, not planing lines, not ghosting, clear divergences, not drawing through ellipses, etc.:
pass
2.The forms need to have consistent foreshortening:
the 1st page its very evident that most of the boxes aren't equilateral and are stretched in one axis. Mostly aim for shallow foreshortening/slow convergence. Similar stuff exists on the remaining pages especially with streched pyramids, cylinder, cones & spheres.
Organic intersections
1.Not drawing simple forms. On this exercise the forms should be kept simple, just like in the previous organic forms exercises. 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
2.Shadows sticking to the forms. The shadows have to follow the form of object they're being casted on, not the form of the object that casts it:
pass
3.Not ghosting lines, not hooking the lines, adding linweight by tracing instead of drawing confident lines etc.:
pass
4.Not drawing through forms. You should always draw through forms, just like in the form intersections exercise:
pass
5.Drawing non stable forms:
some of the sausages are floating or dont provide structure/support to the other sausages. some of them don't overlap each other well.
Next Steps:
Do:
One page of organic forms which will contain a half set of sausages with fully drawn ellipses and other half having contours.
One page of Form intersections keeping in mind equilateral forms and slow consistent convergence.
Arrows
1. Mistake on lines:
pass
2.Arrows not compressing:
pass
3.Lineweight related:
pass
Organic Forms
1.Mistakes on lines:
pass
2.Not following the simple form they need to be; they should be 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
A few sausages exhibit the issues
3.Degrees of the ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static:
pass
4.Not hooking contours:
pass
5.Misaligned ellipses and not drawing the axis line:
pass
6.Ellipses not touching the boundaries, or getting out of them:
pass
Texture Analysis
1.Doing dotting or any kind of hatching to achieve transition:
pass
2.Not doing a seamless transition on the gradients, if either the black bar on the left or the white bar on the right are really easy to spot because the transition isn't smooth enough:
pass
3.All marks on this exercise should be done purposefully, and by looking at the reference before, so scribbling or doing non planned marks is a mistake:
pass
Disections
1.Not wrapping the textures around the form:
pass
2.Not breaking the silhouette:
pass
Form Intersections
1.Repetition of lines, lines not being confident, not planing lines, not ghosting, clear divergences, not drawing through ellipses, etc.:
pass
2.The forms need to have consistent foreshortening:
some of the forms have extereme foreshortening or streched in one axis
Organic intersections
1.Not drawing simple forms. On this exercise the forms should be kept simple, just like in the previous organic forms exercises. 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
2.Shadows sticking to the forms. The shadows have to follow the form of object they're being casted on, not the form of the object that casts it:
pass
3.Not ghosting lines, not hooking the lines, adding linweight by tracing instead of drawing confident lines etc.:
pass
4.Not drawing through forms. You should always draw through forms, just like in the form intersections exercise:
pass
5.Drawing non stable forms:
pass
Side note: There's a lack of lineweight on the sausages causing a bit confusion on which sausage lies on which.
Next Steps:
Do one page of form intersections (not page full of boxes but the mix of regular primitives like cylinders, boxes, cones, pyramids & spheres).
Arrows
1. Mistake on lines:
pass
2.Arrows not compressing:
pass
3.Lineweight related:
pass
Organic Forms
1.Mistakes on lines:
pass
2.Not following the simple form they need to be; they should be 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
A few sausages exhibit this issues especially on page 2
3.Degrees of the ellipses/contours don't change, they stay static:
pass
4.Not hooking contours:
pass
5.Misaligned ellipses and not drawing the axis line:
pass
6.Ellipses not touching the boundaries, or getting out of them:
pass
Texture Analysis
1.Doing dotting or any kind of hatching to achieve transition:
pass
2.Not doing a seamless transition on the gradients, if either the black bar on the left or the white bar on the right are really easy to spot because the transition isn't smooth enough:
pass
3.All marks on this exercise should be done purposefully, and by looking at the reference before, so scribbling or doing non planned marks is a mistake:
pass
Disections
1.Not wrapping the textures around the form:
pass
2.Not breaking the silhouette:
pass
Form Intersections
1.Repetition of lines, lines not being confident, not planing lines, not ghosting, clear divergences, not drawing through ellipses, etc.:
pass
2.The forms need to have consistent foreshortening:
pass
Sidenote : Most of these forms don't have hatched face/plane that indicates which side is facing towards the observer
Organic intersections
1.Not drawing simple forms. On this exercise the forms should be kept simple, just like in the previous organic forms exercises. 2 identical balls connected by a tube of consistent width:
pass
2.Shadows sticking to the forms. The shadows have to follow the form of object they're being casted on, not the form of the object that casts it:
pass
3.Not ghosting lines, not hooking the lines, adding linweight by tracing instead of drawing confident lines etc.:
pass
4.Not drawing through forms. You should always draw through forms, just like in the form intersections exercise:
pass
5.Drawing non stable forms:
pass
Next Steps:
Overall you've followed through the lesson very well. You can move onto lesson 3.
Thanks for the input!
In the Next Steps
please ignore the first point as hatching is optional. Just do 10 more boxes as requested.
Here we're getting into the subjective - Gerald Brom is one of my favourite artists (and a pretty fantastic novelist!). That said, if I recommended art books just for the beautiful images contained therein, my list of recommendations would be miles long.
The reason this book is close to my heart is because of its introduction, where Brom goes explains in detail just how he went from being an army brat to one of the most highly respected dark fantasy artists in the world today. I believe that one's work is flavoured by their life's experiences, and discovering the roots from which other artists hail can help give one perspective on their own beginnings, and perhaps their eventual destination as well.
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